Disappointed in Canada [Archive]

Guy400

07-23-2003, 08:43 AM

I know this is a little late but I'm really disappointed in my weekend bachelor party in Windsor (my buddies party). The hotel at Casino Windsor was nice but I was immediately bummed by the sign on the wall that said something to the effect of, "Ontario law prohibits the free distribution of alcohol inside the casino." Hope #1 crushed. So we all gamble for a little bit (I won $91 American on my 3rd quarter in a slot machine:muscle: ). We then decide to go to a bar and get some food in us so our stomachs reach prime drinking stretch. Eat a little food and start on some beers and hang out there about an hour and a half. We were primed and ready for some nudies. Right next door to this bistro we ate at was the Million Dollar Club and was advertising over 50 beautiful women. Step in the door and wind up paying some exorbitant cover charge ($20 Canadian). We order some Labatt Blue in pitchers (12 to be exact) and start the festivities. We watch the stage show for about 45 minutes and decide it's time for some more "one-on-one" entertainment. This is where Hope #2 was dashed. We find out that Ontario law busts us again. The girls are allowed no contact with any "private" part of the guys (crotch, butt, etc.) and the women cannot touch legal areas of the guys with any part of their "anatomy". So this means no sitting on our laps, no rubbing, grinding...you get the picture. We still had a good time, though. Ten of us drank $310 American worth of alcohol. The only really redeeming factor to the club was the shot girl. Totally smokin' and she held the shot vial (looked like a test tube) in a very convenient area for us to drink from. Because she was partially clothed she was allowed sitting on our laps. I drank several shots of Jager and tequila just to have her company...lmao:D

We stopped into 3 other clubs and got the same Ontario law business.

To sum it all up, Windsor would be fun if you went with your wife and weren't looking for more adult entertainment but if you're checking out a place for a bachelor party--I'd skip it.

Pappy

07-23-2003, 08:47 AM

yeah canada is for ***s:eek: :blah: lmao

its weird how laws vary from place to place...thats why ill hang in logan where the strippers will sit on yer face:eek: ;)

Guy400

07-23-2003, 08:49 AM

Yeah, Ohio is topless-only where alcohol is served and fully nude is juice bars. That's why we said Morgantown next year:D

Chanman420q

07-23-2003, 08:52 AM

guy! arent u married!?:eek2: :p :blah: :devil:

07-23-2003, 08:52 AM

Originally posted by Guy400
Yeah, Ohio is topless-only where alcohol is served and fully nude is juice bars. That's why we said Morgantown next year:D

Sounds like that place can't hold a candle to the fabulous. Scratch and puke jiggly room in logan, WV....:scary:

Striker49

07-23-2003, 08:55 AM

310Rduner

07-23-2003, 08:56 AM

Originally posted by Striker49
:eek2:

http://www.exriders.com/vbb/attachment.php?s=&postid=679546

:cuss:

You beat me to it:devious:

MOFO

07-23-2003, 08:57 AM

Originally posted by Pappy
yeah canada is for ***s:eek: :blah: lmao

its weird how laws vary from place to place...thats why ill hang in logan where the strippers will sit on yer face:eek: ;)

LMAO, I dont think the word "Law" is part of their vocabulary.

I'll keep that in mind.... no bachelor party's in Windsor. I know the last time I was in Canada, I blacked out on Triple X. Strong stuff... found out the hard way that you cant pound them like a normal beer. :eek:

07-23-2003, 08:57 AM

and my *** kickin list grows by the day.....:grr: :mad: :macho

Striker49

07-23-2003, 08:59 AM

Originally posted by Rico
and my *** kickin list grows by the day.....:grr: :mad: :macho

Ahh, I remember why I was bringin that 55 gallon drum of whoopass to HM next year now! Thx for the rememinder. :eek:

I aint skurred. :devious:

Guy400

07-23-2003, 09:02 AM

Originally posted by Chanman420q
guy! arent u married!?:eek2: :p :blah: :devil: Yes but my wife knew it was a bachelor party and she knew that we were going to be attending such places. She doesn't care as long as I don't dip my swizzle stick in the sugar jar.

Pappy

07-23-2003, 09:04 AM

Originally posted by Guy400
She doesn't care as long as I don't dip my swizzle stick in the sugar jar.

swizle stick:confused: sounds like guy needs one of them pumps:eek: :blah:

being married has its privliges......i think:huh

310Rduner

07-23-2003, 09:05 AM

Originally posted by Pappy
swizle stick:confused: sounds like guy needs one of them pumps:eek: :blah:

being married has its privliges......i think:huh

what?? You own the house and she can't leave you?? haha

Guy400

07-23-2003, 09:07 AM

Originally posted by Pappy
swizle stick:confused: sounds like guy needs one of them pumps:eek: :blah: You gotta remember, these are strippers. And as Tom Arnold said about Rosanne, "A 747 is huge airplane but when you're landing it in the Grand Canyon it suddenly doesn't appear that big."

brokeitin3

07-23-2003, 09:12 AM

after lookin at that nasty woman buttermilk gut, my swizzle stick, just fizzled:blah: :blah:

knighttime

07-23-2003, 09:26 AM

I've had good times at some there. I have been involved in illegal activity in most of them:eek2: They even have some SPA's where super hot oriental chicks take good care of you:D

:ermm:

Guy400

07-23-2003, 09:33 AM

Originally posted by knighttime
I've had good times at some there. I have been involved in illegal activity in most of them:eek2: They even have some SPA's where super hot oriental chicks take good care of you:D

:ermm: Two of my buddies went into one of them. Said it was a crappy massage and if he wanted anything more he would have to take matters into his own hands and she wanted extra $ if she was to remain in the room.

knighttime

07-23-2003, 09:36 AM

Originally posted by Guy400
Two of my buddies went into one of them. Said it was a crappy massage and if he wanted anything more he would have to take matters into his own hands and she wanted extra $ if she was to remain in the room.

your boys gotta realize that just cause they are strippers and stuff, they gotta like you and that u gotta treat them nice :D , at least that works for me, lol :devil:

:ermm:

Guy400

07-23-2003, 09:55 AM

You mean dirty talk and Donkey Punches right off the bat don't work with strippers?

bongwater200

07-23-2003, 09:56 AM

Originally posted by knighttime
your boys gotta realize that just cause they are strippers and stuff, they gotta like you and that u gotta treat them nice :D , at least that works for me, lol :devil:

:ermm:

EXACTLY! Hell.... they're just trying to make a living, and more than likely they take home more in a night than most guys do in two weeks! Treat the dancers good and they'll do the same for you! You might even get a little extra luvins! Some guys just need to figure out that it does NOT impress a girl if you refer to her as a ho, skank, *****, or slut in front of your buddies no matter how macho it makes you feel!

07-23-2003, 09:58 AM

Originally posted by bongwater200
EXACTLY! Hell.... they're just trying to make a living, and more than likely they take home more in a night than most guys do in two weeks! Treat the dancers good and they'll do the same for you! You might even get a little extra luvins! Some guys just need to figure out that it does NOT impress a girl if you refer to her as a ho, skank, *****, or slut in front of your buddies no matter how macho it makes you feel!

What do you do if your in a situation were the strippers or bartender want to pay you money to dance..:confused: They also give you free whiskey and beer too....:confused:

Guy400

07-23-2003, 09:59 AM

Honestly, we were nice to them inside the club. Said "please" and "thank you" and never referred to them as any of the beforementioned names. The girls were nice but just wouldn't do any more because of the new Ontario law (that just recently passed according to all the clubs we went to). As far as what was said inside the massage rooms, I've got no idea. I wasn't in there with them but do know that one buddy got a little more than the other.

MOUSE

07-23-2003, 10:00 AM

Originally posted by Rico
What do you do if your in a situation were the strippers or bartender want to pay you money to dance..:confused: They also give you free whiskey and beer too....:confused:

DANCE MAN DANCE :bandit: :devil:

Guy400

07-23-2003, 10:01 AM

Glow Plug

07-23-2003, 11:56 AM

guy I can understandf but that is not nearly as bad is it is here in saskatchwen. There is NO I repeat NO such things as a strip club in the intire province :rolleyes:

86350x

07-23-2003, 02:02 PM

I am at work right now, but when I get home I will post an example of why you are dead wrong about all of canada. Windsors bars were ruined by people going overboard with the dancers.

Don't worry, I'll make the pic pg13. The girls in simcoe, and insarnia do all sorts of stuff to ya:eek:

Rip_Tear

07-23-2003, 02:17 PM

Originally posted by 86350x
I am at work right now, but when I get home I will post an example of why you are dead wrong about all of canada. Windsors bars were ruined by people going overboard with the dancers.

Don't worry, I'll make the pic pg13. The girls in simcoe, and insarnia do all sorts of stuff to ya:eek:

I never heard of the law your talking about guy... maybe its just windsor... Because I know I can get a lap dance at the closest strip joint here.... (I won't mention names, incase they are violating some law...) But I don't think its ontario...

If your looking for a massage place like that, you gotta look in the paper in the wanted ads.... (only reason I know is because they place job ads there and ask you some crazy questions...)
I better stop now...

Guy400

07-23-2003, 03:26 PM

I'm just telling you what we were told by the 4 strip clubs in Windsor. We visited Jason's, Million Dollar Club, Cheetah's and another one that I can't remember the name of. Maybe it's a local ordinance in Windsor, I don't know.

Oh, and the border patrol doesn't like to be joked with. Here's the conversation with her:

Me: Hello!
Border patrol woman: <no answer and was stone faced>
Me: <hands her my driver's license and birth certificate>

Patrol: Citizenship?
Me: Yes

Patrol: <not seeing my humor> Where?
Me: United States

Patrol: Where are you going?
Me: Canada <as we're already sitting inside Canada>

Patrol: <again not seeing my humor> Where exactly?
Me: Casino Windsor

She then proceeds to take the license and birth certificates of every passenger in my car. She sees a pack of cigarettes in the console and makes everyone show the contents of their pockets to verify my answer of one pack only was correct. She gives us some other hassle and then finally lets us go. The moral of the story is don't jack with the border patrol, even if you get an unfriendly b!tch sitting behind the window.

07-23-2003, 03:30 PM

Originally posted by Guy400
I'm just telling you what we were told by the 4 strip clubs in Windsor. We visited Jason's, Million Dollar Club, Cheetah's and another one that I can't remember the name of. Maybe it's a local ordinance in Windsor, I don't know.

Oh, and the border patrol doesn't like to be joked with. Here's the conversation with her:

Me: Hello!
Border patrol woman: <no answer and was stone faced>
Me: <hands her my driver's license and birth certificate>

Patrol: Citizenship?
Me: Yes

Patrol: <not seeing my humor> Where?
Me: United States

Patrol: Where are you going?
Me: Canada <as we're already sitting inside Canada>

Patrol: <again not seeing my humor> Where exactly?
Me: Casino Windsor

She then proceeds to take the license and birth certificates of every passenger in my car. She sees a pack of cigarettes in the console and makes everyone show the contents of their pockets to verify my answer of one pack only was correct. She gives us some other hassle and then finally lets us go. The moral of the story is don't jack with the border patrol, even if you get an unfriendly b!tch sitting behind the window.

So tokin on a green smocke while your chattin with her is a bad idea?:confused:

Guy400

07-23-2003, 03:31 PM

Originally posted by Rico
So tokin on a green smocke while your chattin with her is a bad idea?:confused: Extremely bad....lmfao:D

DEAL

07-23-2003, 03:33 PM

Go to quebec dude , They got some crazy bars over there.

Pappy

07-23-2003, 03:35 PM

guy yer lucky they didnt take you in the...ummm...special search room:devil:

07-23-2003, 03:46 PM

Originally posted by Pappy
guy yer lucky they didnt take you in the...ummm...special search room:devil:

I've had 7 nightmares of the dark VIP room in logan since i got back....:(

Pappy

07-23-2003, 03:48 PM

Originally posted by Rico
I've had 7 nightmares of the dark VIP room in logan since i got back....:(

yeah big black chic with the hotts for ya will either scare ya to death ....or:devil:

07-23-2003, 03:50 PM

Originally posted by Pappy
yeah big black chic with the hotts for ya will either scare ya to death ....or:devil:

make it stop,,,,,,make it stop......:(

Pappy

07-23-2003, 03:52 PM

Originally posted by Rico
make it stop,,,,,,make it stop......:(

i think ill give her directions to your tent in september:o

07-23-2003, 03:53 PM

Originally posted by Pappy
i think ill give her directions to your tent in september:o

I think you'll chit and fall back in it tooo......:cuss:

Pappy

07-23-2003, 03:54 PM

can you imagine her appearing from nowhere only to run into the urban legand and his magic wand:eek:

batgeek

07-23-2003, 03:57 PM

ok this is off topic:

i just got the SACD soundtrack to O Brother, Where Art Thou and every time i hear the lyrics "I bid farewell to old Kentucky,
The place where I was born and raised." on Man of Constant Sorrow, i think of Rico....

Pappy

07-23-2003, 03:58 PM

Originally posted by batgeek
ok this is off topic:

i just got the SACD soundtrack to O Brother, Where Art Thou and every time i hear the lyrics "I bid farewell to old Kentucky,
The place where I was born and raised." on Man of Constant Sorrow, i think of Rico....

lmfao....we need to make that the hatfield theme song..lmfao

batgeek

07-23-2003, 04:03 PM

i wouldn't mind....actually it would be pretty cool!

BUMP THAT ***** HOMIE!!! roll right thru the middle of Logan with everyone blasting that song :D

btw: get the soundtrack, good stuff on there

TheRedRebel17

07-23-2003, 04:09 PM

Originally posted by Guy400
Extremely bad....lmfao:D

Hope da good ole skillet Cuz/n dotn go up there:eek:

Quad18star

07-23-2003, 04:20 PM

Actually you would be able to have 30 grams of pot on you and all they would do is give you a ticket . New law in Canada that allows possession of pot ( as long as you are using it for your own purpose not sharing with friends or dealing). It's a crazy law but ah well . Heck if you're gay and want to get married come to Canada ( I swear there's some messed up people in politics) . Quebec does have the best strip bars . For $20 canadian you get to be touchy feely . I don't know if I'd wanna be touching them though:ermm:

BlazingYamahaYz

07-23-2003, 04:26 PM

i know im going to sound stupid....but could someone please explain the whole "rico's ******" picture to me.....as in, why did someone make it??? looks like photoshop to me? somone explain please!!!!:confused:

Pappy

07-23-2003, 04:29 PM

sorry...what happens at hatfield...stays at hatfield:devil:

Striker49

07-23-2003, 04:31 PM

Originally posted by BlazingYamahaYz
i know im going to sound stupid....but could someone please explain the whole "rico's ******" picture to me.....as in, why did someone make it??? looks like photoshop to me? somone explain please!!!!:confused:

What Kenny said, and its not photoshopped either. Trust me, I had the raw image on my computer... :huh

She is exactly as the sign says...nothing less. :p

BlazingYamahaYz

07-23-2003, 04:34 PM

kk.........................eeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwww ww..............lol...........:devil:

batgeek

07-23-2003, 04:38 PM

midget push-ups

that is all i can say....

TheRedRebel17

07-23-2003, 05:51 PM

Originally posted by batgeek
midget push-ups

that is all i can say....

after doign some searching, thse wouldnt be the midget push ups ...would they rico:devil:

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid71/pccdcf7aa72ffe9b5370db655b61903d1/fb96cadf.jpg

popo

07-23-2003, 05:53 PM

Originally posted by Rico
I've had 7 nightmares of the dark VIP room in logan since i got back....:(

And Rowlrag had 7 wet dreams of peaches.

All we heard from him all night give me a dolla!!!

batgeek

07-23-2003, 06:00 PM

wow! if rowlrag woulda danced for a dolla, what did she offer Rico?

its a consumers market down there in Logan!

popo

07-23-2003, 06:02 PM

Originally posted by Quad18star
Heck if you're gay and want to get married come to Canada

For $20 canadian you get to be touchy feely.

There you go Bradley... Jackass!

Thats like $5.00 American eh!. Rowlrag would be punching his munchkin all night.

popo

07-23-2003, 06:05 PM

Originally posted by batgeek
wow! if rowlrag woulda danced for a dolla, what did she offer Rico?

A box of used rubbers from Rowlrag's couch

batgeek

07-23-2003, 06:07 PM

i dint need that mental picture :confused2

ROFL

86350x

07-23-2003, 06:53 PM

Quebec is even more wild then the two locations I've mentioned.

Most of the women there are like that "on the wild side" so it makes things fun. The girls in the booth I have dealt with have always been friendly towards me. When they ask for your reason for crossing, I just say I'm going to the casino. Last time I went, they wouldn't let me in. They said I was too drunk, but I don't even remember stumbling.

I'm in the witness protection programm, and I gave sophie some booby tastles, not sure if thats a good enough cover up or not.:ermm:

http://tellico.off-road.com/wwwthreads_uploads/1146333-john5.jpg

86350x

07-23-2003, 06:56 PM

yeah I know I look stupid:ermm: But if a naked girl kisses ya right before a pic, your gonna blush, and if your me start laughing too:confused2

Striker49

07-23-2003, 06:59 PM

Originally posted by 86350x
Quebec is even more wild then the two locations I've mentioned.

Most of the women there are like that "on the wild side" so it makes things fun. The girls in the booth I have dealt with have always been friendly towards me. When they ask for your reason for crossing, I just say I'm going to the casino. Last time I went, they wouldn't let me in. They said I was too drunk, but I don't even remember stumbling.

I'm in the witness protection programm, and I gave sophie some booby tastles, not sure if thats a good enough cover up or not.:ermm:

http://tellico.off-road.com/wwwthreads_uploads/1146333-john5.jpg

There you are you sumbich! I found you!

Na..just messin. Cool pic...lmao. I bet it sux bein in that protection program...are ya limited on some things you can do? :confused:

86350x

07-23-2003, 07:02 PM

Lol, that was just a joke, don't want it gettin all photo shopped n stuff.

Striker49

07-23-2003, 07:10 PM

Originally posted by 86350x
Lol, that was just a joke, don't want it gettin all photo shopped n stuff.

:blah: You're no fun.

86350x

07-23-2003, 07:12 PM

Sorry:ermm:

batgeek

07-23-2003, 08:24 PM

nice bewbs :D

sickmojave

07-24-2003, 12:01 AM

Originally posted by batgeek
nice bewbs :D

http://www.click-smilie.de/sammlung/liebe/love-smiley-085.gif :eek2: http://www.click-smilie.de/sammlung/liebe/love-smiley-085.gif

07-24-2003, 12:53 AM

Originally posted by batgeek
ok this is off topic:

i just got the SACD soundtrack to O Brother, Where Art Thou and every time i hear the lyrics "I bid farewell to old Kentucky,
The place where I was born and raised." on Man of Constant Sorrow, i think of Rico....

I've got that soundtrack at home and yes it's a pretty good album.....:o

400exBro

07-24-2003, 04:09 AM

ya Canada is one messed up country... provinces wanting seperate, allowing gays to marry,,, decrimilizing weed... and all becuase our prime minister is French.... this would of never happened if he was a true Canadian...

and i haven't heard of this so called law... unless they just past it recently... still haven't heard of it...

Pappy

07-24-2003, 04:10 AM

its no real law.....i called them and told the whole province to screw with guy:devil:

Guy400

07-24-2003, 04:17 AM

Originally posted by Pappy
its no real law.....i called them and told the whole province to screw with guy:devil: Well thank you for wrecking our bachelor party :eek: :devil:

BTW, if any of you do happen to go to Windsor. Visit the Million Dollar Club and ask for the Hungarian girl that doesn't speak English too well;)

Pappy

07-24-2003, 04:19 AM

ive visited the million dollar club and million dollar saloon in dallas. them texans sure know how to party:bandit:

Glow Plug

07-24-2003, 04:56 AM

Originally posted by 400exBro
ya Canada is one messed up country... provinces wanting seperate, allowing gays to marry,,, decrimilizing weed... and all becuase our prime minister is French.... this would of never happened if he was a true Canadian...

and i haven't heard of this so called law... unless they just past it recently... still haven't heard of it...

lol so ture. Yes I country does suck well not the country just the goverment :rolleyes:

Like oh yeah were cool lets give the damn indians all our money (sorry If I come off a bit racist)

alright lets legalize pot becuase people are sick of buying it from a dealer becuase they need it ???

Gay marage?? I;m not going to touch that one......

Provnice wanting to seperate I guess it is under standable sort of becuase IMO ontraio gets all of the support for whatever they need but hey thats just me

86350x

07-24-2003, 05:57 AM

Lol, it sounds like maybe they just don't like Guy for some reason. That chick in the pic is originally from hungary, but now she lives north of toronto. She speaks good english and french though:ermm:

400exBro

07-24-2003, 07:16 AM

Originally posted by Glow Plug

Provnice wanting to seperate I guess it is under standable sort of becuase IMO ontraio gets all of the support for whatever they need but hey thats just me

aaa good ole ontario... we always get respect... i am glad i live in ontario, but i hate that it is flat, we probably want some mountains and stuff... the only close to the rockies is Blue mountian a skiing resort