Showering Habits....so tru, lol

[blondie69]

Showering Habits - How to shower like a woman

1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups.
4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, and long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone.
5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes.
8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until it’s red.
9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
10. Rinse conditioner off hair.
11. Shave armpits and legs.
12. Turn off shower.
13. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex.
14. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
15. Check entire body for zits, tweeze hairs.
16. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
17. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.


How to shower like a man

1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.
3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire your wiener and scratch your butt.
4. Get in the shower.
5. Wash your armpits.
6. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
7. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound in the shower.
8. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding areas.
9. Wash your butt, leaving butt hairs stuck on the soap.
10. Shampoo your hair.
11. Make a shampoo Mohawk.
12. Pee.
13. Rinse off and get out of shower.
14. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain hanging out of the tub the whole time.
15. Admire wiener again.
16. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
17. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass wife pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.
18. Throw wet towel on bed.

[Ralph]

Originally posted by blondie69

How to shower like a man

1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.
3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire your wiener and scratch your butt.
4. Get in the shower.
5. Wash your armpits.
6. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
7. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound in the shower.
8. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding areas.
9. Wash your butt, leaving butt hairs stuck on the soap.
10. Shampoo your hair.
11. Make a shampoo Mohawk.
12. Pee.
13. Rinse off and get out of shower.
14. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain hanging out of the tub the whole time.
15. Admire wiener again.
16. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
17. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass wife pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.
18. Throw wet towel on bed.


hahaha

[honda400exrider]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA:eek2: :eek2: God I almost died! LMFAO!!! Yet that is so true...:devil :p

[AtvMxRider]

WOO WOO...... LMFAO

[4wheelboy]

hahahaha thats not alll true ;) ;) ;) ;)

[blondie69]

Originally posted by 4wheelboy
hahahaha thats not alll true ;) ;) ;) ;)


o wait...did we miss a step in the mens part?? .....don't think I'll add that neither:eek2:

[Chef]

Originally posted by 4wheelboy
hahahaha thats not alll true ;) ;) ;) ;)

YOUR SICK! AAAHHH! :eek:

Originally posted by blondie69
How to shower like a man

1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.
3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire your wiener and scratch your butt.
4. Get in the shower.
5. Wash your armpits.
6. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
7. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound in the shower.
8. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding areas.
9. Wash your butt, leaving butt hairs stuck on the soap.
10. Shampoo your hair.
11. Make a shampoo Mohawk.
12. Pee.
13. Rinse off and get out of shower.
14. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain hanging out of the tub the whole time.
15. Admire wiener again.
16. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
17. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass wife pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.
18. Throw wet towel on bed.

lmfao..thats 100% me especialy #1,#2(cept the part about wife)#3 is the oppostie of what i do...im fat and well....lmfao,#6, #12, #14, #17, and #18

[FourFiftyFour]

Originally posted by Chef
YOUR SICK! AAAHHH! :eek:

you shouldnt be one to say that JERGEN'S BOY!:blah :blah

lol thats great. I think you were a HAIR off on the womens thing tho..:p

[JustRace]

Originally posted by CDaleChick
you shouldnt be one to say that JERGEN'S BOY!:blah :blah

LMFAO is that lotion still sitting next to you donnie? lol

[flaneledholes]

LMFAO!!!!!! well, I aint married, but it is still true!!!!!! LMFAO! I even catch myself exposing ymself to strangers making the "woo woo" sound!:D :cool:

[SGA]

This one actually made me laugh:p

[sweet300ex]

LMAO!!!!!

[Jellyrolls]

OMG ROFLMAO

[bluebaron]

ha

[dabombdale]

you know that 10% of men sing in the shower, the other 90% masterbate, do you know the song they sing?


because i sure don't

[FourFiftyFour]

Originally posted by JustRace
LMFAO is that lotion still sitting next to you donnie? lol

he took a pic and he put a BIG BLACK X over the lotion..........:huh :huh

[crap-banshee32]

haha thats great!!!!!lmao

[Mr_Bub400ex]

Originally posted by dabombdale
you know that 10% of men sing in the shower, the other 90% masterbate, do you know the song they sing?


because i sure don't

lmao dale

[Nausty]

lmao, so true, sept for the peeing part:huh

[Juggalo]

have you been spyin on me? and you guys that say you don't pee in the shower are a bunch of liars!! lol. you can't tell me that if your in the shower and you gotta take a leak your gonna get out of the shower and take one then get back in, or even wait till your done showering? i don't think so.

[Nausty]

lol, I go before or after:o thats pure nausty man@!

[JustRace]

Originally posted by Nausty
lol, I go before or after:o thats pure nausty man@!

I agree. It doesn't take me that long to take a shower so i can wait, pissing in the shower is nasty. Atleast try to hit the toilet from in the shower, thats bonus points.

[cudaman]

when peeing in the shower all you have to do is make sure to directly hit the drain. then your all good.

[blondie69]

Originally posted by Juggalo
have you been spyin on me? and you guys that say you don't pee in the shower are a bunch of liars!! lol. you can't tell me that if your in the shower and you gotta take a leak your gonna get out of the shower and take one then get back in, or even wait till your done showering? i don't think so.

i don't pee in the shower:huh thats jus a lil uhh....nasty! like that'd be gross if u like...hit a shampoo bottle and then forgot about it and then used it....ewwwwwwwww......

[Glow Plug]

Originally posted by JustRace
I agree. It doesn't take me that long to take a shower so i can wait, pissing in the shower is nasty. Atleast try to hit the toilet from in the shower, thats bonus points.

lmfao



these were pretty good to :D

[Got Huevos?]

that list of way off for me. some of that stuff just is wrong. ad nasty. especially peeing in the shower.

[exriderdude]

Originally posted by JustRace
Atleast try to hit the toilet from in the shower, thats bonus points.


Good call dude:macho

[lil400exman]

the soap and butthairs i dont quite get...................but besides that its pretty true and peeing in the shower doesnt apply................ok on time i did fall asleep in the shower.......and u know the old saying about what hot water does........................:( but besides that is pretty true!

[redroost85]

Holy schiz this is hilarious! I might have to check my pants, lol! This is classic! I wish this wasn't true....how do you all find out about me?!:D

[TheRedRebel17]

i gotta say i have done all those except 7 and 16.
pretty true for me...

[cdalejef]

Originally posted by blondie69
Showering Habits - How to shower like a woman

1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups.
4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, and long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone.
5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes.
8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until it’s red.
9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
10. Rinse conditioner off hair.
11. Shave armpits and legs.
12. Turn off shower.
13. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex.
14. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
15. Check entire body for zits, tweeze hairs.
16. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
17. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

Originally posted by Jeff@QuadShop



Lmao this is the greatest thread ever. When you piss in the shower just aim it down the drain, now i know some of you guys cant aim becuz you cant find it but its not that hard. Jp :p

[tants]

hahaha

[SGA]

Man, dont lie to me! All guys pee in the shower, ya just aim down the drain.
Now, i can see where girls would not, they dont have a aiming device like us guys. Playboy taught me all about that stuff:D

[UglyMotha™]

Originally posted by blondie69
i don't pee in the shower:huh thats jus a lil uhh....nasty! like that'd be gross if u like...hit a shampoo bottle and then forgot about it and then used it....ewwwwwwwww......




if you can't pee in the shower without hitting a shampoo bottle i'd hate to see how difficult it is for you to pee in a toilet:huh

[Tommy 17]

jeff u and ur funny dam smilies haha... thats friggon halarious....

[QuadTrix6]

Originally posted by blondie69
2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.

[4Man450es]

:D hahahahahahahahahahahaha WOOO HOOO!

[250x#93]

HAHA thats great:devil

[toby400ex]

wow, wheres my wife when i shake my wiener and make a woo-woo sound :confused: :macho

[hessianmx111]

damn this is a good thread

[Juggalo]

Originally posted by SGA
Man, dont lie to me! All guys pee in the shower, ya just aim down the drain.
Now, i can see where girls would not, they dont have a aiming device like us guys. Playboy taught me all about that stuff:D

THANK YOU sga! lol. sayin you don't pee in the shower is like sayin you don't fart under the covers in bed and then stick your head under (dutch oven lol)

[Dune Surfer]

If she is a good wife she won't hide anything:D

[SGA]

Originally posted by Juggalo
THANK YOU sga! lol. sayin you don't pee in the shower is like sayin you don't fart under the covers in bed and then stick your head under (dutch oven lol)
LMAO! Gotta see if it was a good one:D
I suppose we have people here that dont smell their own farts either:rolleyes:
Blondie, this is one of the funniest threads I have read here. You go girl!