I just don't know what to do.

[HondaRacing83]

It's not very often I come on a quad forum looking for somewhat personal advice, but I just don't know where to turn. I don't post many threads but when I do its many at a time because I'm frustrated and impatient and quick to act. It's this whole racing thing and me that are making me and my dad fight. Here's the dilemma, I wanna race, Dad don't want me to. I talked to my Dad about racing Boyers(AWRCS round 5) about 2 weeks ago. I asked him if I could race it and that its June 30th for future reference. He just kinda him hoe hawed around about it. I offered to pay for all the fees,gas, everything. Today I asked him Hey dad you think I could still run Boyers? He just kinda tweaked and was like No. I'd never agree to that. I'm like wtf? Then just kinda walked away. Like an hour later we talked about it and hes yelling at me saying I'm not old enough. I'm like theres 3 classes I can run with my age? (I'm 14). He said " I say your not old enough". I just kinda get instantly pissed and just sat there. He said I'm not mature enough, and that I don't know what I'm getting myself into. He refused to go into further detail, but I don't get it. He said there's no way I'd let you. How am I supposed to watch you? It'd be different if it you were on like an MX track. I explained to him I want no part of quad mx, there is practically no tracks that allow quads anymore and I like riding woods. He just keeps saying that I don't know what I'm getting in to and I'm not mature enough. He said I could do quad mx, and I kinda flew off the handle I'm like well Jesus Christ, I've been spending all my money trying to get my quad xc ready, youve seen every part ive bought, ive spent countless days riding and practicing by myself trying to better myself to get faster, wouldnt something of clicked by now? You think if I wanted to ride mx id be out in the field building jumps? Hell I made a practice xc track in the woods, and you don't think I would wanna race? & He goes on I'm not mature enough. I don't get it, I've spent an unbelievable amount of time the past 2 weeks practicing for Boyers. I don't mean to brag, but I'm pretty damn fast. 99% of the time I ride by myself to, because my dads to damn lazy to go back with me. Then he says "Your to hard on that thing. Your gonna blow it up" He acts like he'd pay for it in the first place so whats it any of his business? Then he rants off how I "believe everything I read on the internet" WELL SORRY I'm trying to better myself without spending money by setting the sag on the rear shock. I've got friends younger than me that race. I was just so mad after that conversation and thought well ****, I'll get a dirtbike and race MX. Then decided I really didn't want to, I wanna race quad xc. Don't really wanna deal with a bike either. I dont know where to turn at this point. I can't just "Ride for Fun" I don't have the mind to. I wanna race.

[ben300]

Originally posted by HondaRacing83
It's not very often I come on a quad forum looking for somewhat personal advice, but I just don't know where to turn. I don't post many threads but when I do its many at a time because I'm frustrated and impatient and quick to act. It's this whole racing thing and me that are making me and my dad fight. Here's the dilemma, I wanna race, Dad don't want me to. I talked to my Dad about racing Boyers(AWRCS round 5) about 2 weeks ago. I asked him if I could race it and that its June 30th for future reference. He just kinda him hoe hawed around about it. I offered to pay for all the fees,gas, everything. Today I asked him Hey dad you think I could still run Boyers? He just kinda tweaked and was like No. I'd never agree to that. I'm like wtf? Then just kinda walked away. Like an hour later we talked about it and hes yelling at me saying I'm not old enough. I'm like theres 3 classes I can run with my age? (I'm 14). He said " I say your not old enough". I just kinda get instantly pissed and just sat there. He said I'm not mature enough, and that I don't know what I'm getting myself into. He refused to go into further detail, but I don't get it. He said there's no way I'd let you. How am I supposed to watch you? It'd be different if it you were on like an MX track. I explained to him I want no part of quad mx, there is practically no tracks that allow quads anymore and I like riding woods. He just keeps saying that I don't know what I'm getting in to and I'm not mature enough. He said I could do quad mx, and I kinda flew off the handle I'm like well Jesus Christ, I've been spending all my money trying to get my quad xc ready, youve seen every part ive bought, ive spent countless days riding and practicing by myself trying to better myself to get faster, wouldnt something of clicked by now? You think if I wanted to ride mx id be out in the field building jumps? Hell I made a practice xc track in the woods, and you don't think I would wanna race? & He goes on I'm not mature enough. I don't get it, I've spent an unbelievable amount of time the past 2 weeks practicing for Boyers. I don't mean to brag, but I'm pretty damn fast. 99% of the time I ride by myself to, because my dads to damn lazy to go back with me. Then he says "Your to hard on that thing. Your gonna blow it up" He acts like he'd pay for it in the first place so whats it any of his business? Then he rants off how I "believe everything I read on the internet" WELL SORRY I'm trying to better myself without spending money by setting the sag on the rear shock. I've got friends younger than me that race. I was just so mad after that conversation and thought well ****, I'll get a dirtbike and race MX. Then decided I really didn't want to, I wanna race quad xc. Don't really wanna deal with a bike either. I dont know where to turn at this point. I can't just "Ride for Fun" I don't have the mind to. I wanna race.

if your old man doesn't want you to race, he doesn't want you to race....tough part of the deal man....

to me, id say you probably aren't mature enough and your dad is probably partially right, judging by some of your threads about some of your problems you've had in the past couple year with him and your mom concerning school and what not......but also, what 14 year old is mature to begin with? none of them...i know for a fact, i sure as hell wasn't

your dad also sounds like a royal douche canoe and a lazy *** mohter ****er and just doesn't want to take the time to be involved with what your interested in.....kinda ****ty, but its the cards your dealt..

id say three things, 1) do as your parents tell you, buckle down, earn there respect, and then try and convince your dad two let you do this...but i suspect that there probably isn't going to be much changing your pops mind just cause of the way he is,

2) wait till your in your 20's and start racing...you'll more than likely be on your own by then and you can do as you please..

3) id be 99% positive that your not 99% as fast as you think you are...not to be a dick, but riding by yourself or wiht a couple of buddies who don't ride hat much, doesn't give you a good gauge how fast you are....i thought the same thing, and had a big wake up call at my first race..

[finsteratv]

He mentioned him watching you? Maybe he has a fear of you getting hurt and him not being able to help or know and it's just kind of his way of covering that. Try to have a calm talk with him and if he starts to fly off the handle bars be the mature one and dont just storm off and get mad too. Might not work in your house but ask your mom if he's talked about it to her at all. Shouldnt be just your dad's decision if you're mother's there too.

[Drfat400ex]

Man I got the same problems, my dad hasn't came back to the bush to see what I've done in months or fired up one of his wheelers to come back for a tour. I wanted to start not even racing MX but just goin down to tracks at practices every once in a while and havin some fun but nooope. I'm hardly even allowed to buy parts. My rear tires are worn right out and I was gonna buy new ones but he wouldn't let me.. Like I bought the quad, and I'm buying the tires... But that's the way **** is it sucks havin a stubborn old man. Just keep er calm and if he doesnt ever agree to it, then you're either SOL or do like me and just do it anyways... But sometimes that's not the best idea... Most of the time.

[HondaRacing83]

My mom doesnt care what I do. My dad always raced quad mx and i never had an interest in it. My dads been pissin me off lately. Ive never had these problems before. Theres a whole nother deal with the bow. Only trouble i had in school was math. steady D every report card. I had all A's and B's besides that. If hes so worried about me getting hurt, why doesnt he care when im back in the woods hours for riding. Ive wrecked and rolled back there but i was quick enough to catch it or smart enough to move at the right time or do whatever so nothing fatal. I ride with my dad maybe once a month. i dont really do anything with him anymore, we went our seperate ways in interests. he got into harleys i got into quads even more. at this point idk if i should dump more money into my quad and hope my dad will let me or just get a dirtbike. when im in my 20's id be in college, i wanna be able to make it to xc1 before i get serious about college and what i wanna do after. hell i had a life plan planned out, but i wont be able to make it to xc1 if i cant start racing now

[dxcody]

Not to be a d*ck either, i mean i consider you a good online friend, your one of my favorites on this site. but trust me its a entire different universe when your out there racing.

I was really bummed because i thought i was *Fast* but then i got out there with riding with 5 or 6 C class riders and its just not as easy as it is racing with your friends around fields and trails that you ride everyday.

But this isnt what this thread is about so i will further add that,

Your dad cares about you (i know, too original, right?) but seriously, XC races... there are 8 - 12 different miles full of obsticals that you could be hurt on and track officials may not find you right off the bat. Thats what he is thinking.

Luckily for me, 2 of my best friends started racing in 2010 and neither of them have gotten injured in any way (they just go out there as if they were on a Sunday cruise) so my parents havent seen the fualty side of racing which sometimes cant be pretty.

You have high hopes, which is awesome, but at the same time when you get out there for the first time its probably going to be a huge bummer.

The only reason you think you and your dad are going seperate ways is because your 14. I was the same way man. Now im 17 and me and my dad get along great.

Once you hit a certain age (for me anyways) your dad is going to realize that your old enough to make your own mistakes.

For me it was about 15-16.

I started chewin when i was 11. My dad caught me week after week and about age 15 he finally said, Ya know what, if your gonna chew, your gonna chew i obviously cant stop you. And That is one of those things that brought me and my dad closer some how (BTW i wish i didnt and i am not promoting chewing in ANY way, because its hard to quit and a HUGE waste of money. )

But trust me man, it gets easier.

What i would do, is the same thing i did. Set him down, and tell him right off the bat, *PLEASE LET ME SPEAK MY PART then YOU CAN TALK.

And about the age thing, who cares. Donnie Ockerman started racing when he was 25. and he was xc2 champ in 08.

I have rode with him and you can tell he was jsut a natural born rider, but still. You can do it.

McGill didnt start until he was 15 or 16.

Just keep your head up, and wait it out. Your time will come. I promise.

[dxcody]

By the way,

RACE MX! If he will let you race MX then go for it, i know you said you didnt like it but heck, its great XC training, and think of it this way, if he sees you ride a full season (or a few races) of MX, he may trust your abilities a little more and let you start racing XC.

Heck ya never know you could be awesome at MX or something.

I know i would rather race quad MX than switch to a dirtbike anyways... lol

everytime he says "Man you did good!" Say, "Yea you should see me race XC....."

[MX MaNiAc 06]

It's crappy when your parents don't support you in this sport. It's a family sport and when you go to the track you will see kids pull off the track and their dads immediately patting them on the back and congratulating them.

Tell him to go to the race with you in Boyers and watch. Then politely ask to run the next local race. Tell him how much it means to you and show him that you can ride your own race without riding over your head and hurting yourself.

My dad didn't support me either nd it really bums me out. He took me to the track when I was 14 but he would get home too late from work a lot. I later found out he would work OT so he was home too late on purpose..

When I turned 18 I loaded up and said I was going to a friends house. Came home late that night and dropped a 1st place plack in his lap and said thanks for the support. Now that I'm 22 and can afford it I'm getting into racing. But I will never be on any national level. Im pretty sure I would be if my old man had took me to races when I was younger. I say you push him to take you to races. But be respectful about it. Tell him that you will regret it in the future if you don't at least try it out. 14 is a great age to start...

[blaster99]

Racing and practicing are 2 completely different things. You could think your pushing as hard as you can while practicing, but racing is going to make you pick it up a gear. With you being so young, you will probably make foolish decisions on the track, I know I did when I was 13-15. The more mature you are the better decisions you will make out there.

I wouldn't worry about making it to the pro XC class. I'm not trying to be a dick, but I think most people don't understand how fast pros are actually going. I couldn't even imagine going much faster on an MX track than I am now..... and Chad Wienen was still a sold 8-10 seconds a lap faster than me every national round I went to last year. You have to be so damn talented to even make it close to the pro class. If you are really meant to be racing up there, it won't take long to pick up the speed and get to that class.

If I was you I would try and earn the respect of your dad as far as racing goes. He sounds pretty stubborn, but he clearly has a soft spot for ATV racing. Maybe do a few MX races first. Then try to talk him into XC. Don't flip out when talking to him either. The calmer you act the more mature he will think you are. Actions speak much louder than words, so change his mind with your actions, not by arguing with him.

[fastredrider44]

Be patient. Most kids have to wait until they're 16 to race anyway. I didn't enter my first XC race until I was 18 and didn't have to rely on anyone. I've progressed through the ranks just fine.

[HondaRacing83]

Thanks guys. I guess it just kind of shocked me because Dad was always the cool, chill one and was more of letting me get away with what I want haha. I think Quads is where I belong, I wrecked my buddies 250f last fall in the woods. Parents still don't know about that ha.. My moms pretty neutral in the whole situation. I've never had a problem with her thinking somethings "to dangerous".

[jkosakowski]

Im 16 now and started racing xc in ny when i was 14 in the college B class. (i had no clue what i was doing lol) anyways i would try to get your dad to let you go to a practice at a mx track and show him you can handle the quad. Luckily my dad let me do one race then i was hooked and so was he. But i would give it time and just keep talking to him. You should even try to get him to go to a race to watch together. Come up to a (wnyoa race) its a good experience.

[HondaRacing83]

Its not like I wanted him to drop me off and leave, I wanted him to stay obviously lol.

[OldGuyonaQuad]

Accept the fact that you will not be able to participate in this race. Show him that you have matured by accepting his response. Ask him if he will attend the race with you as a spectator. Before during and after get in the pits and meet and speak with other racers and their parents. IDK if my perception is reality but i would assume MX is more dangerous? If so get facts to support your case. If all else fails run away from home. :D

[chronicsmoke]

Build a big-ol FMX ramp and tell him that if you're not allowed to race, you're going to start freestyling instead :devil:

[HondaRacing83]

Chronic that made me chuckle hahaha :p
But yeah thats what I was gonna do ask him to watch it with me. Ive got a close friend that races and I was originally gonna run the race with him in the same class

[slightlybent47]

Id say be thankful you have a quad to ride at all. I was never allowed to even ride a mini bike, much less a dirt bike, (quads hadn’t been invented yet)lol
At the same time I was allowed to ride horses, witch is way more dangerous then riding a quad. Horses have a mind of there own and will sometimes do things that can get you hurt and there nothing you can do about it.
Quads on the other hand only do what you make them do.lol

If you dad doesn’t think you mature enough to race then you should listen to him and maybe ask him what would help change his mind. He knows you better then anyone else and I’m sure he has his reasons.

I didn’t start riding dirt bikes until I was 18 and could by one for myself. What’s the rush? You are only 14, you still have your whole life ahead of you, there will be plenty of time to ride-race when you get older.

You said you had not gotten hurt wrecking in the woods and you were able to control your crash and keep from getting hurt.
That rite there shows your immaturity, you were just lucky, that’s all.

You may think your fast because you have nothing to compare yourself to. Riding with friends or by yourself doesn’t give you a realistic view of what racing is all about.

It may turn out you can do well but be prepared to be humbled on your first time out.

If he will let you race MX then race MX for now and maybe he will see you are willing to compromise.

Show some interest in what he likes to do and share it with him just as you want him to like what you want to do and share it with you.

Do you do your chores every time without mom or dad asking you over and over again?
Do the things that need doing without having to be asked. Pick up after yourself and don’t leave it for your parents to do. Be proactive and do things before you’re asked to. That will go a long way to showing you are becoming more mature.

Show him your mature with your attitude as well as your actions

[Zakradu398]

You might as well wait 4 years until you are 18. It seems like a long time but it seems like your only choice.

Also the whole "fast" thing. Where I ride around here (trails). There is not one single person who can touch me on a bike so I figured I had a good chance at placing well. Then I went to my first harescramble which was a R&D(no longer there) in AWRCS I think 2 or 3 years ago. I went into the C class hoping for a top ten finish in one of my first races. Needless to say. Halfway through the first 11 mile lap, I was thinking I was passing out from exhaustion. It was the muddiest race of the year and I did 2 laps in 2 hours. I came in something like 25th out of like 50 people lol. Your never as fast as you think

[CJM]

My parents bought me a go kart as a kid, it was old, beat up and was only mine cause I made it run. Then I got a dirtbike and smashed my hand on a tree pretty bad and all my toys were taken away.

They wouldnt buy me a quad when we moved so I had to save up and buy my own and they werent very happy.

Anyways, hes your dad-I think more than anything he fears you getting hurt pretty bad and thats a legitimate issue I think. Ive never raced myself and I want to but there is no one gonna pay my medical bills should I hurt myself. I would say Im a pretty dang good rider-but Ive had my fair share of falls and most recently hurt both my shoulders so bad I am aching and its now a month later.

Try and convince him, show him you really want to do it. he still says no thats life, your 14 and live in their house with their rules and there isnt much you can do about it right now. Bide your time if you have to.

[Ruby Soho]

i never had the issue really. i never got into racing because of money, but once i was 16 or 17 i ran random races with friends here and there. my parents didnt really care if i raced or not, it was my hobby, my deal.

i had friends in your shoes though. to the point they wouldnt even let them buy their own quads with their own hard earned money. and basically, your not going to convince your dad of anything. hes your old man, and its his rules or the highway. and he has the right to have it that way...it is his roof over your head, and his food you eat right?

[HondaRacing83]

its moms food.. haha but yeah thats all true. yeah i do all my chores and do laundry and load the dishwasher etc without being asked

[slightlybent47]

Originally posted by HondaRacing83
its moms food.. haha but yeah thats all true. yeah i do all my chores and do laundry and load the dishwasher etc without being asked


It’s not mom’s food, its mom and dad’s food. They are a team and they share everything equal. It doesn’t mater if there married or not and if you adopted or not, you’re a family. Maybe not a traditional family, but family none the less.

Make the best of what you have, life changes. Go with the flow and enjoy life as best you can. It’s all you have and it’s up to you how you deal with it.

Optimism or pessimism your choice!


Good job on the chores though.

[HondaRacing83]

mx wouldnt be that bad i just dont wanna spend the money getting it setup for mx.

[slightlybent47]

MX may open the door for you to do XC later down the line.

[b0rn c0nfused]

Originally posted by HondaRacing83
mx wouldnt be that bad i just dont wanna spend the money getting it setup for mx.

Flip your front rims and get spacers for the back rims. Problem solved, lets go race mx. :cool:

[chronicsmoke]

Originally posted by b0rn c0nfused
Flip your front rims and get spacers for the back rims. Problem solved, lets go race mx. :cool:

Those poor kitties :( lol

[HondaRacing83]

yeahhhh because im gonna race mx, with gbc x rexs :p

[dxcody]

Originally posted by HondaRacing83
yeahhhh because im gonna race mx, with gbc x rexs :p

Those are about the best i believe... Your gonna want a real heavy tire for MX...

You got this :macho

[Balaz_73*00]

Just run the xc quad as is. Who cares if its "not set up for mx" At the beginner level its more about rider than machine. Race experience will help no matter if its xc or mx. Racing has made me a wayyyyyyyy better overall rider.

[slightlybent47]

Originally posted by Balaz_73*00
Just run the xc quad as is. Who cares if its "not set up for mx" At the beginner level its more about rider than machine. Race experience will help no matter if its xc or mx. Racing has made me a wayyyyyyyy better overall rider.


X2

Race mx with the bike just like it is. It may lead to being able to race xc next year.

[muddy400EX]

Originally posted by HondaRacing83
yeahhhh because im gonna race mx, with gbc x rexs :p

DO IT. bigger tires equal more distance traveled per every rotation of the wheel:D you'll smoke them all because of your big tire trick!

but seriously, if your dad will let u race mx, then race mx. it will get you in the race environment. and even though its mx, it will help with future xc. because no matter what genre it is, it will make you faster, even when your in the woods

[WhiteZee]

Originally posted by slightlybent47
What’s the rush? You are only 14, you still have your whole life ahead of you, there will be plenty of time to ride-race when you get older.
I strongly disagree with this. There's no guarantee that he will always be able to ride. I hit my head at age 23 had have had balance problems ever since. Needless to say my best riding days are over.

[HondaRacing83]

Only thing with riding MX is I have absolutely 0 friends that ride MX. I have a lot of friends that ride xc and trails. Mx wont be near as fun havin nobody to ride with? Maybe i should just keep settin my quad up for xc and wait until my dad will let me race

[ben300]

Originally posted by HondaRacing83
Only thing with riding MX is I have absolutely 0 friends that ride MX. I have a lot of friends that ride xc and trails. Mx wont be near as fun havin nobody to ride with? Maybe i should just keep settin my quad up for xc and wait until my dad will let me race


make new friends dude! branch out a bit...never know how much fun you can have making new friends and meeting new ppl

[chronicsmoke]

Originally posted by ben300
make new friends dude! branch out a bit...never know how much fun you can have making new friends and meeting new ppl

I agree, I used to ride with my redneck neighbours when I lived in the country. They all had stock bikes and talked about how fast they were and rode without helmets and a beer in one hand most of the time.

I rode with them once or twice after I moved but they were too sackless to ever hit jumps nevermind an actual track so eventually I lost contact with them. Now I've got a GREAT bunch of guys that I go to the tracks with, hanging out in the trailers is half of the fun IMO

[HondaRacing83]

I dont know, I really like woods. One thing hes worried about is one of his friends son broke his back racing xc2 gncc. He recovered fine but I've seen a lot more people get hurt in mx. I'n gonna drah him to awrcs race and show him what they are like, I don't think he knows there are officials and help everywhere. I dont think he will mind once he understands what its like

[cloudpump]

I would think your dad has a reason he is saying no. Need to compromise with him...I remember when I was 14, thought I knew what my life would turn out being like. 29 now, my how it's changed.

[dxcody]

Originally posted by ben300
make new friends dude! branch out a bit...never know how much fun you can have making new friends and meeting new ppl

Not to get off topic but i just read what it says under your name ben, and i was rollin.

[rbgnwa45]

Your dads a wussy and you should race :o.

[ben300]

Originally posted by dxcody
Not to get off topic but i just read what it says under your name ben, and i was rollin.

haha....ya, i do little things like that to spice the exriders world up a bit from time to time lol:muscle:

[trick450r]

Keep in mind how scary it must be for your father to watch you race. I started racing motocross at 15 with all the support my dad could give me, I quit at 19 because I found out VIA extended family my dad was having serious stress related heart problems while watching me. He had a massive heart attack barely a month after I quit, if we were in the hills somewhere at a track, he would be dead.

I would gear up to race and ease your dad into it, its not easy being a parent. And I'm not one.

On another note, if you want to race remember: its not if your going to get hurt, its when.