okay... looking for some solid advice here... ladies please give your 2 cents also

[trailrider894]

So... i was out on a date with my GF and she was constantly texting a guy friend of hers that had a break up with his GF... she has hung up on me to recieve this guys calls... replies to his text messages first... if i talk to her while she is texting him she never hears what i say and makes me repeat everything... thing is i love this girl so so very much!!! I try telling her how it makes me feel... but she just closes her ears and doesn't stop. What should i do?? Is this my fault??

[backwoodsracer]

Originally posted by trailrider894
So... i was out on a date with my GF and she was constantly texting a guy friend of hers that had a break up with his GF... she has hung up on me to recieve this guys calls... replies to his text messages first... if i talk to her while she is texting him she never hears what i say and makes me repeat everything... thing is i love this girl so so very much!!! I try telling her how it makes me feel... but she just closes her ears and doesn't stop. What should i do?? Is this my fault??



well buddy i had the same problem it turned into nothing but u need to have a sit down talk !!! face 2 face!

[trailrider894]

thanks man... problem is i have a habit of bringing up this stuff not face 2 face... then she gets upset. Am i at fault here?

[SRH]

pssh i wouldnt have that, thing is...you saying something doesnt solve the problem...its her initial motif thats dangerous...shye might stop talking to the guy but whats going on in her head, u say something and she stops talking to him youve damaged your relationship and you got a ticking time bomb...if you care about her enough ride it out for a few weeks, mention your not happy about what shes doing and leave it at that...if things dont change best possible thing you could do is break it off before it gets ugly

[slightlybent47]

No not at all, she is being selfish and inconsiderate. A real talk is in order.

[trailrider894]

Thanks guys... i have this planned out so i can talk to her tommorow.

[trailrider894]

I am still open to suggestions on how to deal with this though?!?! so if anyone still wants to chip i would love to hear it!!

[trailrider894]

Thing is i really love this girl!!! We have been together for awhile... I want breaking up with her to be the last last resort!!! I just want her to realize that i would change in a second to make her happy... but unfortunetly i don't think she is willing to do the same... but then again i haven't asked her to change anything.


I am pretty tweaked and upset about all this right now... this situation happened to me once before back in high school with a different girl... that relationship ended terribly... she should have realized she gave up a real man for some guy who was a pretty boy...

[SmthHonRider99]

that's not right on her part man. somethins up that needs to be talked about. let us know how it turns out. If I were in your situation I wouldnt put up with that at all..

[Pipeless416]

Originally posted by trailrider894
Thing is i really love this girl!!! We have been together for awhile... I want breaking up with her to be the last last resort!!! I just want her to realize that i would change in a second to make her happy... but unfortunetly i don't think she is willing to do the same... but then again i haven't asked her to change anything.


i hate to say it, but its not meant to be if one of you needs to change for the other to be happy.

[Kickstarts-suck]

I had the same problem with my GF after I bought her phone and pay the bill..

After I kept telling her how much I hated it she stopped.

I trust my girl and knew it was nothing it just really annoyed me.

[slightlybent47]

I agree you shouldn’t change for someone other then yourself. Tell her how you feel and let the chips fall where they may. If she loves you she will come around. You know how woman are they are always sticking there nose into everyone else’s business. She probably trying to help someone else she is over looking you. just think it through.

[trick450r]

Step 1) Procure phone from girlfriends custody.

Step 2) Raise arm in upward motion.

Step 3) Lower arm in rapid downward motion while releasing phone towards floor.

Step 4) Raise leg and crush said phone on floor.


Now you got her attention!

[BakerRacing40]

Originally posted by trick450r
Step 1) Procure phone from girlfriends custody.

Step 2) Raise arm in upward motion.

Step 3) Lower arm in rapid motion while releasing phone towards her.



Now you got her attention!
^^^ edited ^^^
one less step and same result... kinda :devil:

the next time she strikes up a conversation, pull out your phone and call some chick you know and start a conversation with them. when your done with your call just act like nothing just happened. she'll probably get upset but just tell her that is how she made you feel. try to explain not argue.

[Quad18star]

So you're pissed because she's texting another guy? I text my girl friends all the time and my fiance texts her guy friends too.

I don't know how old you are ... but one thing you'll learn , is that you have to build trust in a relationship. Right now , from what you're saying, I don't see that you have any trust in her. If there's no trust , I'm sorry to break it to you , but there's no relationship.

[300ex mxracer]

The way I understand it she is ignoring you to talk to this other guy, which aint right. I ave had the same problem Id sit her down and talk about it. If shes a keeper she will understand. Hopefully it goes better than mine did lol

[250r rider 88]

Originally posted by Quad18star
So you're pissed because she's texting another guy? I text my girl friends all the time and my fiance texts her guy friends too.

I don't know how old you are ... but one thing you'll learn , is that you have to build trust in a relationship. Right now , from what you're saying, I don't see that you have any trust in her. If there's no trust , I'm sorry to break it to you , but there's no relationship.

i agree it took me forever to learn this and once i finally did my current relationship has turned out better than any of my previous ones

if you dont trust her, you cant love her, its a false love, thats what i had to learn the hard way

[tman12345]

I dont think the problem is that he doesnt trust her, its that the girl is ignoring him, while on dates and such to text this other guy, which does not seem right. i bet if the situation was reversed she would be really mad correct? just explain how you feel about it to her.

[bomberman]

Just say to her. Listen, you are my bottom *****, do you know what i am saying? If you dont stop texting this mofo im gonna have to get my pimping hand out and show u how we roll round here.

Second thought just talk to her about it:chinese:

[250r rider 88]

Originally posted by bomberman
Just say to her. Listen, you are my bottom *****, do you know what i am saying? If you dont stop texting this mofo im gonna have to get my pimping hand out and show u how we roll round here.

Second thought just talk to her about it:chinese:


haha i loved that south park episode

"Yes, I do believe i know what you are saying" haha

[trick450r]

Originally posted by BakerRacing40
^^^ edited ^^^
one less step and same result... kinda :devil:

the next time she strikes up a conversation, pull out your phone and call some chick you know and start a conversation with them. when your done with your call just act like nothing just happened. she'll probably get upset but just tell her that is how she made you feel. try to explain not argue.

haha I like it, way to make the system more efficient.

Step 4) Tag her mom.

Now thats a winning combination!!

[CADWELL]

You need to stop giving her as much attention as you are...to the piont where she is the one that will have to initiate communication. This way you'll get a true feeling of how important the bond is between you guys.

She'll probably start to wig out and say stuff like you're jealous or you don't trust her, but this is where you have to move in and be smart and tell her how you feel.

Without you telling us more details about the guy she is texting, it's hard to give a better perspective of her and that guys relationship between the both of them.

At 33 yrs old, I've played all the games in the book with women and this is one of those situtaions where you're gonna have to play mind games to get the truth out...it's evident that something isn't normal....JMHO

[quad2xtreme]

So basically your girlfriend is so ignorant that she doesn't know better? Guessing she just needs you to tell her how you feel and to bring her up to speed on how a person should treat another person?

Get real. She knows what she is doing is ****ty. The good news is she is doing it so you know so she isn't sneaking around hiding it.

Now you just have to deal with it or move on. If she has feelings for the guy they will evolve...probably quicker if you give her ****. If you can't deal with it move on. If you want to work it out then you better make yourself more interesting.

Never chase a woman to keep her from cheating on you or try to cage her in. Let her know it is ok to leave you or even to cheat on you but at least have the respect to let you know...so you can move on.

Relationships come and go. I would be gone if my wife tried to cage me in. I have to say that I don't disrespect her though by giving other women more attention than she gets and I don't maintain constant contact with any woman but her. I certainly don't have any urgent need to text any woman but her...seriously, she can't wait a day or so to send him an email instead? Seems like you probably have the wrong girl.

[XxXsupa-flyXxX]

Keep her in line with the back of your hand!

[JR3]

the dude shes textin is deff tappin that for real and theres no such thing as just a guy friend unless the dudes gay hes tryin to get in her pants id say u wana text him and ignore my calls then go live with him and have him pay all ur bills or cut the **** *****

[trailrider894]

Okay so here is an update... We saw each other today for awhile... i brought it up. She was just sayin that she was texting him to help him out. She said she knew that she would be mad if was texting another girl or taking phone calls from another girl while i was with her. We just kinda shared our minds with each other for awhile. I plan on having another talk with her on tuesday after i get of classes for the day. So what are these " mind games" i am really wanting to test this relationship... i am not gonna waste time here like i did last time around... i told her that the guy she was texting needs to " grow some balls and deal with his problems like a man " and stop taking them to my girlfriend or i am gonna take him out...

but yeah i am really wondering how i can test this relationship without making her upset... I want to make sure she is willing to work all this out... because if she won't stop helping this guy... i am gonna blow a gasket.

[trailrider894]

some more things transpired tonight...i will update tommorow at school... i am having a rough day and need some sleep. so talk to you all tommorow. ( eh hemm COLLEGE not high school... 2nd year in college i might add..)

[ZeroLogic]

Originally posted by XxXsupa-flyXxX
Keep her in line with the back of your hand!


:macho

[trailrider894]

okay here we go again... so last night late... i had a chat with one of her friends that has known her for a very very long time. They said that the guy she is talking to is known for being a douche and for only doing **** like this to get in girls pants... i said that this guy was making up this suicide **** just for attention... her friend agreed totally. Her friend told me to just detach myself from her emotionally and be prepared for the worst... i asked if it was like her to cheat on someone... and they said they didn't really know... but they knew the guy she was talking to is a total man whore...



so as of today i have pretty much cut myself off completely from her emotionally... i haven't said i love or anything that would signify anything more than friendship.


a-lot of you guys seem to think i should just break up with her... well i am not goin too... i want help advice on how to make sure she stays the hell away from this punk ***... I am about ready to beat the **** out of him... here is a quote from his facebook status about his apperant problem.. " more depressed than ever.... its destroying my soul.... i just wish she could believe me when i tell her i love her. :'( i cant wait to visit satan in hell. " and this is my GF's reply... " Andrew, if she doesn't believe you... then she's not worth the pain. "


god this sux

[ZeroLogic]

Tell her that what her friends said, say you don't trust this kid and you don't want her talking to him. Thats pretty much controlling but its the only way to get her to stop. Either that or beat the kids ***.

The Facebook comment seems like hes a little loser, and your girl didn't really do anything wrong with what she said.


Originally posted by trailrider894
okay here we go again... so last night late... i had a chat with one of her friends that has known her for a very very long time. They said that the guy she is talking to is known for being a douche and for only doing **** like this to get in girls pants... i said that this guy was making up this suicide **** just for attention... her friend agreed totally. Her friend told me to just detach myself from her emotionally and be prepared for the worst... i asked if it was like her to cheat on someone... and they said they didn't really know... but they knew the guy she was talking to is a total man whore...



so as of today i have pretty much cut myself off completely from her emotionally... i haven't said i love or anything that would signify anything more than friendship.


a-lot of you guys seem to think i should just break up with her... well i am not goin too... i want help advice on how to make sure she stays the hell away from this punk ***... I am about ready to beat the **** out of him... here is a quote from his facebook status about his apperant problem.. " more depressed than ever.... its destroying my soul.... i just wish she could believe me when i tell her i love her. :'( i cant wait to visit satan in hell. " and this is my GF's reply... " Andrew, if she doesn't believe you... then she's not worth the pain. "


god this sux

[trailrider894]

yeah i know what she said wasn't wrong... just more of an example of how the kid is... Well i now have evidencce that the guy stole another guys girlfriend and in the past... so yeah i am gonna use that... i have been gather info on this punk...

If she leaves me for him... she wasn't worth it and didn't deserve a caring guy like me.

[440racer66]

yeah i would have to beat his a$s. hes clearly doing this for attention. so give him some one on one attention to say the heck away from your girl and if he txts her again he answer to you again

[BlaineKaiser450]

Just tell him hes being a p***y and that hes not fooling anyone. I'd tell your gf to just stop talking to him. If you are already unattached then if the worst does happen, then you'll be ready. Like you said before, if she chooses him over you, she wasn't worth your time.

[JR3]

Originally posted by trailrider894
yeah i know what she said wasn't wrong... just more of an example of how the kid is... Well i now have evidencce that the guy stole another guys girlfriend and in the past... so yeah i am gonna use that... i have been gather info on this punk...

If she leaves me for him... she wasn't worth it and didn't deserve a caring guy like me.

dont give her a chance to leave u for him the writings on the wall dude just drop that ***** like the lying cheating whore she is!

[Quad18star]

Originally posted by JR3
the dude shes textin is deff tappin that for real and theres no such thing as just a guy friend unless the dudes gay hes tryin to get in her pants id say u wana text him and ignore my calls then go live with him and have him pay all ur bills or cut the **** *****

Please tell me you're joking.

So you say there's no such thing as just a guy friend? Oh man .. I better inform my best friend and tell her husband to watch out then. Seriously ... we've been friends since we were kids ... she married a really close friend of mine ... I'm not tappin it and I wasn't tappin it before they got married either. Some of my closest friends are girls and some of my fiancee's closest friends are guys.... and neither of us even remotely have any jealousy... it's all in how much you trust someone.

[trailrider894]

JR3 i don't need your advice... you are the reason men, as of recent, are pure evil and nothing but sex hungry pigs.

[JR3]

yes i single handily (sp) am bringing down men haha are u kidding me ive been where u are thats why i have such a strong opinion on the subject but hey its life figure it out on ur own

ps: oh yea im evil 666 i love sex haha

[MX MaNiAc 06]

Some dude tried that on my girl a few months back. It was pathetic and very strange. He would text her saying how hes not good enough for his ex and he didn't deserve to live. Obviously expecting her to say "ohh thats not true, you're a great guy." She kept saying what do i do? One day i picked up her phone and answered "well you gonna kill yourself or what? Chit or get off the pot buddy!" He acted like he was getting all sad by what she said and I said no, this is her boyfriend and I'm sick of hearing about your pathetic texts. My girl thought it was really mean but after a couple weeks she said things changed and he leaves her alone. haha

[rodeo#11]

man my girl did that to me one time to...should would play this "oh so i cant have guy friends" bs and i flat out told her..you can but you gotta open your eyes and realize that their flirting with you not actually looking for advice.. then he told her to break up with me and thats when she came to me saying how i was right and she was sorry and she stopped talking to him.. and i knew she did cause i paid the cell bill and i knew what was going on lol :devil: i see it like this man if she don't care enough to honor a simple request then she isn't worth your time...I'm not saying its wrong for a girl to have a guy friend but in your case he is obviously just doing this crap to get to better know your girl and in turn get closer to her so he can break ya'll up been there and seen it happen. Tell her straight up how you feel and if she can't except that then maybe its not meant to be because later on down the road if you was to get married and something happened like this is would probably be 10 times as worse...

[trailrider894]

well i talked to her about it today again in person... i told her what i knew about the guy. I said that unless she was going to respect the fact that i don't want to her talking to this guy, i was gonna leave... so only time will tell right now... i think she understood. I didn't sugar coat it either... there was a long pause afterwards... but she still was making up excuses but i just cut her off and said i didn't care... that if she loved me she would listen to my wishes... and she couldn't expect me to listen to hers if she won't listen to mine.

[trx310R#24]

Originally posted by trick450r
Step 1) Procure phone from girlfriends custody.

Step 2) Raise arm in upward motion.

Step 3) Lower arm in rapid downward motion while releasing phone towards floor.

Step 4) Raise leg and crush said phone on floor.


Now you got her attention!


I LOVE IT! HAHA

[mineralgrey01gt]

how long is a while you have been together? If she is more worried about him than you from my experience it will end bad. It happened to me twice and the last time it was going to happen i got out before i hurt myself. Its not worth it to stress over it. Im not saying it will be the same in your case but i was with the girl 3 1/2 years and it was a bad time in my life. Now im with a really great girl, couldnt be happier

[jkiserracing]

My wife just said: give her the cold shoulder immediately. Girls want what they cant have...... Period.

Now.....that was straight from a chic!! Get to it!

[trailrider894]

i am kinda giving the cold shoulder... i am making her do the work in the relationship not me... if she wants to talk well then she has to talk to me... i don't call her anymore... but if she calls me i will talk. you know that kind of stuff... i mean how far can i go without hurting her??? i think she gets it by now...

[jkiserracing]

you wont hurt her by doing a little innocent "ignoring" Did she say to herself...."I hope I'm not hurting his feelings while I text this guy??!?!??" While you sitting right there mind you. Turn up the coldness a little bit more my friend. No kind of....flat turn it on. I know your worried if you turn it up too much she won't care and just move on. But i'm telling you if she likes you even a little......she will be as worried as you and won't go anywhere

[trailrider894]

okay guys thanks so much... i guess i owe some of you guys... i am gonna give her some cold shoulder and see if she really wants me... well the test starts tommorow... i'll keep you guys updated if you wish...

[hendershot106]

Wow. Seriously.... :huh I wouldnt waste my time with that girl. At all. People are responding that you need to trust your girl. Bullspit. IF she isnt trustworthy to begin with you CANT trust her. And from the sounds of things she isnt very trustworthy.

Personally i would cut my losses early and RUN LIKE HELL if it was me.

Ive dated a LOT.... because ladies come and go...and racing is always there.... One thing is certain.... as i read earlier in this thread someone commented on changing as an individual to maintain or progress a relationship.... IF YOU NEED TO CHANGE OR HAVE YOUR GF CHANGE TO CONTINUE A RELATIONSHIP you are flat out wasting every second of your time.

IF your in college you should be enjoying college life.

Dont be a idiot and sit waiting for her to call. Go out and make more friends, and more friends....date around.. meet people... dont intentionally try to find a girlfriend and most likely you will meet someone that just "clicks" into place and you will move on...... and a year from now it will just be another forgotten memory.

[Quad18star]

Originally posted by trailrider894
well i talked to her about it today again in person... i told her what i knew about the guy. I said that unless she was going to respect the fact that i don't want to her talking to this guy, i was gonna leave... so only time will tell right now... i think she understood. I didn't sugar coat it either... there was a long pause afterwards... but she still was making up excuses but i just cut her off and said i didn't care... that if she loved me she would listen to my wishes... and she couldn't expect me to listen to hers if she won't listen to mine.

So now you're going to dictate to her who she can and cannot talk to?

You're going down a road that leads to nowhere ,bud. Might as well call it quits now.

I've seen buddies of mine try and tell their now ex-girlfriends who they could and could not talk to. The girls broke up with them ... then buddies started following them to work , to the mall , to the new boyfriends places. As I said earlier , if there's no trust, there's no relationship.

You'll learn soon enough, when in a relationship , you cannot tell the other person what they can and cannot do. Just like if she told you that you could not hang out with your buddies anymore ... you'd tell her to F' off.

[quad2xtreme]

I usually don't offer advice in these threads because people only follow the advice they want to hear. I do like reading them though...I am hoping he keeps posting and she gives him the big runaround, etc. It is like a mini-Melrose Place.

All she has learned so far is she need to respect his time and not do this in front of him. :D So now, he can wonder what she is up to the whole time he is not with her.

Me, I would just say 'let's just be friends so we aren't tied down to each other". Then never call her again.