Who Knows

[troyleepred719]

I dont know what to say, Im lost for words, and have no where to go, so im just gonna type away, read it if you want, dont bother if u dont want to, this is just me emptying....



I was the high school hero, 36 fights in 4 years, lost 3 of them , and one was because i was jumped. Played foot ball, startin center, 3 years, lived for it. It was the nights you cant remember, the friends youll never forget. High School was my dreams.... I live in a Small town, and everybody knew who i was. I joined the fire dept, and I love it. Seen some awesome stuff, seen some horrible stuff, its life..
Im a big guy, 5'10, 279, benched 410 when i graduated.
Some say Im cocky, I think im confident, I live by the rules that you give what you get, i believe in OAK tree justice, and think that criminals have the easiest way of life in America.

In high school, nothing but drink, up until my senior year, went to school 3 weeks in a row drunk, it was fun, little did i know i was a loser. On September 17, 2004 i got into a car accident. I was in the back seat of a DODGE NEON, driving in the rain on a donut. Car lost control, and donut blew, the driver could have controlled it, if he wasnt stoned. I was thrown out the back window into the gorge, breaking 4 ribs, the my lower spine, and a concussion, shouldnt have lived, but god thought other wise.

The next months would be hell, senior year was gone, i couldnt walk, or go anywhere. I finally went to school after a while. A lot of surgery, and therapy, got me walking again. Shouldnt have gotten in the car, but i was tougher than luck, and everyone knows, it wont happen to you.

School was different, i wasnt tough anymore, and i had to catch up with all the work. February came around. No one was willing to care. THats when i Met her. The most outspoken girl, whose immaturaty and careless ness, was entertaining in herself. She had beauty that was able to compete with the angels, and the smile to light up the midnight sky. She gave me a chance. Thats why i love her.

The next few months were full of late night conversations, loving her more each day, seeing in her eyes that It was in return. After about 9 months, it happened. She said yes, even though we had been an item since the very begining. I found her ways odd. She lives by the bible, abstinent until marriage, the self control she displays is attractive in itself. She is the one, and i feel it everytime i look in her eyes.

I walked across that stage in June, bottom of the class. My father who could care less of me, told me he was proud. This giant of a guy cried in front of hundreds, thankfully, i wasnt alone. I kissed her, and thanked her, because she had been my motivation, my reasoning to succeed, to provide a good lifestyle for her, the one that she deserves. That stage meant nothing in technially terms. I was so behind, that after two years in the real world, im still working on my diploma.

Its funny the way that life works. You dont know what you have until its gone. You could live to be a hundred, or you could die tommorow. I truly believe that god gave me a second chance. I need to take it. I have been sober for two years now. I am working on my diploma, and in the morning I will going to my local college to sign up for courses. I have been working at an auto parts store, where I have finally saved up enough to move out on my own.

I dont know what to say. I feel like a loser, I do nothing but work, and have nothing to show for it. I live in my parents house, with just my dog, and no one who seems to understand. I dont know where to go from here. I need to better myself, and prove to myself, and the world that i am going to make the best out of my second chance. I want to make a good life for the woman that beleved that i was worth her time. I want to be able to thank her in so many ways, but the only thing i can afford is my love. One day i will give her much more, but until than, she just has my heart.

The moral of my story, is that life is there to be lived, but every once in a while you need to stop and think, where am i foing with this? what is going to happen?. i was tommy t in high school, and three years later, i drive a delivery truck for 8 bucks an hour, and dont even have a diploma. Dont make that mistake. LIfe is a beautiful thing but its not going to be there forever, one day it ends.

My father told me once, " You need to make the best of life, when your on your death bed, you will know all of the things you have done, and all the things that you have accomplished. It is when you know all of lifes answers when god takes your soul"

I know I have jumped around with this, and made no sense at alot of points, mostly because right now my emotions are a mess. I appreciate being able to vent here, and you reading this, for those of you who could, it seems like this is the only place to go right now. So i will say good night, and wish you all a good week...

[quadwanter]

your about the same age as me. sometimes life seems to make no sense but you just gotta keep goin. Best of luck man hang in there

[mineralgrey01gt]

that was deep man, im really sorry to hear about your crash and its good to hear that you recovered. Your girl sounds like your guardian angel. Never let her go man, I know how it is to let someone you love dearly slip away and it is the worse feeling in the world. You will make it man, you went through hard times but just look at life each day and not into the distant future. Take it one day at a time and I swear it will make it much easier and much more worth while.

[wilkin250r]

My deep moment was a few years later than yours, and not nearly so tragic. But I'll never forget it.

Driving home from work, I downshifted on a small hill and my transmission blew out on me. This happened at a time that seemed stressful in my life. Family problems, working overtime on special projects, working toward my college degree and approaching finals. Everybody has these problems, but not always all at once. They seemed to be piling on my shoulders, slowing my steps and weighing me down. I certainly didn't need car trouble on top of it. Now I have to sit in the blistering sun and wait for a tow truck. Of all the rotten luck...

I did the only thing a person could do, I coasted until I found a suitable place to pull over. I found a spot near a small doll shop, and pulled into the dirt parking lot. I went inside, and met an old couple that ran the shop and borrowed the phone (This was before cell phones were really mainstream). After I made my call, I had nothing to do but wait, so I talked with the old couple. I mentioned my car troubles, and how it added so well to the rest of the problems in my life. I ranted and raved, cripes, can't I get a BREAK?!?

The old lady says "Yeah, I know what you mean. I have leukemia..."

Holy crap. Leukemia. That's a horrible disease to have. The chemotherapy leaves you sick, tired, and just to top it off, ugly. The bone marrow transplants leave you in pain. And the whole ordeal will leave you broke. It's a slow, ugly death.


It hit me square in the chest, and forced me to realize how stupid and selfish I sounded. It was like an immediate transformation. I wasn't stressed over finals, my semester was almost over. The blistering heat suddenly became a beautiful summer day. The overtime at work wasn't killing me, it was putting money in my pocket. A few days later, I used that money to buy a great-looking 4x4 that I loved to drive, instead of that crappy little car.


I know it's not as dramatic and impressive as a spiral into alcohol, a crash that should have left me dead, and a blossoming love to pull me through it all. But it really was life-changing, hardly a day goes by I don't think about that phrase "I know what you mean, I have leukemia". It reminds me to look on the bright side of things, and how little and petty most problems truly are. Really, how bad is your little broken A-arm compared to a debilitating and life-threatening disease?

And I'm glad my little lesson didn't almost cost me my life, it didn't cost me my family. All it cost me was my transmission in a crap car I hated anyways...

[Toadz400]

Very moving story, from you and Wilkin.

I've had similar experiences but none that were really near-death.

[trick450r]

Well while we are sharing our life changing moments i guess ill share mine.


I was always really close to my mother, not as close as my father, but still, we had a great relationship. My mom was always a drinker, not socially, but ALWAYS drinking. Which wasnt much of a problem, she wasnt out to get drunk she just enjoyed drinking, so be it. When my grandmother died my mom started drinking more and more. This is when the spiral began. We turned our heads at first, thinking it would come and pass. But as time went on she turned into a terror, waking my sister and i up in the middle of the night for no reason but to terrorize us. She was killing my father as well, he has a stressfull job and he had to come to this every night and it killed me. One day my father told me he was having consistently bad headaches all day. I told him to go to the hospital and we then found out he had two mini strokes (my father was 50 at the time, he is now 52). This was when my mother really went off the deep end. She wouldnt leave her room for long periods of time, in and out of the hospital for alcohol related illness. in the state of connecticut a person must choose to admit themselves to rehab, so that was out of the question. Things continued untill my father had a heartattack on his way to work, and another in the hospital. This is when i stopped caring in school and basically dropping out of my life. MY senior year and highschool and this had to be going on in my life.

One night while my dad was in the hospital my sister stayed out late. (i was controlling her curfue at the time, by orders from my father) and she came home alittle late, i dont remember how late but it was very excusable. From my room i heard her and my mother fighting about it and then i heard something loud hit the floor. I later found out it was a pan my mother actually threw at my sister. I yelled at them to stop but they didnt so i decided to make a statement. I turned around and put my hand through a 1 inch think plaster wall (for anyone that knows what plaster walls feel like this was 6 months ago and i still cant move 1 finger and have 50% flexability in all the others, and this will be for life). They both stopped and i told my sister to call the cops. 5 cops showed up at my house and my mother told them that i punched her "just look at his hand".


Those cops tried to arrest me. untill my sister came out and told them what really happened, cops dont mess with distraught children. My mom was taken away and i didnt see her for 6 months. I found out she was living with her father, she couldnt come back because my sister and i are under protective custody of my father.

my mom called me one morning, on my way to school. Just to tell me to have a good day. I blew it off and thought she was probably drunk. So i said "um okay mom, yeah you to" then i hung up. And to this day i think about that moment and cry, 2 days later i was out with my girlfriend and my dad called me and told me to come home asap. I come home to find 2 cops in my driveway, i walk in and my dad is sitting on the couch crying (my dad DOESNT cry EVER) i was then informed that my mom died the day before of kidney failure and numerous other detectable problems. Obviously i broke down. As time went on i realized that she may have died right when i hung up on her. This ate at me for quite a while. But eventually i realized that my life was just beginning and that this was a test, nothing more. I cant let this ruin me. I got back to school and graduated. I am now taking first semester off to just relax and work, but i am going for business managment and biology, and then later for environmental engineering at numerous local schools.


I guess the point where my life turned was when i realized that this could have happened right after i talked to her...for the first time in months. My life will never be the same. this took place on goodfriday of 2007.




Im not sure why i typed this all out, im really late for work right now. But i need to thank you guys, you and my girlfriend are the only ones i have sat here and told my story, thank you.

[chris46250r]

Troyleepred, thats a touching story but I just dont get it I guess. You talk of wanting to buy her something but can only afford your love. You mention 8 bucks an hour driving parts around. Then BAM! I get to the bottom and you got a 2004 truck that "is stock for now", which means more $$$ later. And you have a 2006 fourwheeler. I dont care how you got this stuff or who paid for it, but if you are wanting to do all this for "her", why not sell something.

[rbgnwa45]

Very good reads from you guys! My life is pretty ****ty also, but I'm still happy LOL! I failed grade 7, then I was a nobody through 5 years of highschool, was socially outcasted, my 3rd year I was suspended for 2 weeks for possession of a joint, which made me miss my exams, then the following semester, I was kicked out for skipping 2 classes a week straight, a month before exams. I graduated 3 months ago and I'm 19, with really ****ty grades, that will affect what college I go to, and how much money I make for the rest of my life. Unlike you, I have no vehicle, no quad, and no girlfriend, and I went from making $12/hr full-time to making $8 part-time, and I have nothing to show for it, except some clothes and speakers. I don't know why you guys sound depressed, I've always been simple, being happy with few things. All I really want for the next 15 years is a vehicle, quad, girlfriend, and a well paying job, what else is there? I live in the country so there's nothing to ever do. When I had my ****ty dirtbike from 00 to 03 (for the few months that it ran LOL) it was the happiest time of my life. If I had all the stuff that you do, I'd cream myself :huh Don't get so wrapped up in the word 'loser'. If you think you're a loser, then you are. Know what I mean? I guess I wish I had more friends through highschool because at the moment I have at max, 4. It's not such a bad thing because I completed avoided all drama and bull****, so now, I'm fine with having few friends, being alone and wondering about my future. How did you get into 36 fights in 4 years? My 400-student highschool would have expelled you after 4 :eek: .

[400exrider707]

According to your sig you're only 19, you have your whole life ahead of you man, no worries. At that age, I think almost everyone worries about stuff like money and what they're going to do with the rest of their lives. I went to college for four years and in that time worked for the same amount of money, it was tough, but I got through it, and yes my parents helped me, so it was easier, but still there have been times I thought I would never get out of debt (still working on that one haha) and I thought nothing would go my way, work and school all piling up at once... in the grand scheme of things its all minor! Honestly school is more about seeing how much stress you can deal with I think, those who can handle it graduate... some can handle it better than others though. I couldn't handle it very good, but I did handle it and got through it. You will too. Wanna go riding sometime and relieve some stress? haha.:devil:

[wilkin250r]

Originally posted by rbgnwa45
with really ****ty grades, that will affect what college I go to, and how much money I make for the rest of my life.

No it won't. The only thing that can hold you back is YOU.

True, you probably won't be going to an Ivy League school. But if you want a college education and a well-paying job, you can have it.

A community college will accept anybody, regardless of your grades. You don't even need a diploma. If you APPLY yourself in community college, and get good grades, a whole world of colleges opens up. They will look at your comm. college performance a lot more heavily than your high school performance. If you have a 4.0 in community college for two years, ANY college will take you.

The only thing holding you back is the amount of effort YOU want to put into it.

[400exrider707]

Originally posted by wilkin250r
No it won't. The only thing that can hold you back is YOU.

True, you probably won't be going to an Ivy League school. But if you want a college education and a well-paying job, you can have it.

A community college will accept anybody, regardless of your grades. You don't even need a diploma. If you APPLY yourself in community college, and get good grades, a whole world of colleges opens up. They will look at your comm. college performance a lot more heavily than your high school performance. If you have a 4.0 in community college for two years, ANY college will take you.

The only thing holding you back is the amount of effort YOU want to put into it.


It's a proven fact now, most employers could care less about grades, its more about seeing that you went and tried it. I believe on a national survey, companies made priorty lists about what they looked for in applicants and grades was like 19 on the list. Heck even I got a job! haha, plus I think some places realize most people with 4.0's have no common sense. :p

[trxwannbe]

i've been there and had that moment to i was always a hellion i got suspended every other week from 5th grade until freshman year of highschool where i got myself in with the wrong people and was arrested and expelled. well i cleaned up enough to get back into the school and floated by for a year and a half and then the s*** hit the fan all of a sudden i didn't have enough credits to graduate on time even if i took summer school after junior year and i was like ok then i'll step it up a little and deal with summer school after senior year and then i was stupid enough to fall for a girl and when she broke up with me i was way overdramatic and got caught with alcohol at school. My senior year. thankfully they didn't call the cops and i was only suspended for a long period of time but when they called my dad to have him pick me up he got so stressed out and his bp skyrocketed and he had a heart attack on the way got into an accident the whole nine yards and that was when it really hit me that i wasn't only driving myself into a hole but really hurting the people around me and i did everything i could from there, i went to counseling, payed for tutoring after school so i could hand my dad that ticket to my graduation and got myself where i needed to be to move on in life. after doing all of that i managed to get back with the girl that started this crap in my senior year and we've been together for 8 months now and have our own appartment, i'm going to school full time as a major in computer science technology and working full time as a designer at a company that makes parts for a company called electric boat thats near my hometown.

sometimes there isn't really anything you can do to make someone realize how small their problems are or how big they're going to be you have to live your life and fix what you can and when you do fix something hope others learn from your mistakes to because i swear to god i don't know what i'll do if my little sisters end up being like me

[Bradracer18]

Sorry to be the bad guy here....but grades DO matter...and I think these guys know that, but are trying to prove another point.


Apply...get in.....study your butt off....do well, get into a better college...and do the same.....if you can earn a 2.5 or better(in a nicer college/university)....you will be fine in getting a job.


Many of the companies I have interviewed with, consider your GPA right away....and if it makes the cut...then they could care less......then, its all about your job history(work your butt of there too....get good references).....and your other stuff....volunteer work, clubs, organizations, honors,etc.

Its all about what you want, and what you are willing to do to achieve that goal

[sly400ex]

Originally posted by troyleepred719
I dont know what to say, Im lost for words, and have no where to go, so im just gonna type away, read it if you want, dont bother if u dont want to, this is just me emptying....



I was the high school hero, 36 fights in 4 years, lost 3 of them , and one was because i was jumped. Played foot ball, startin center, 3 years, lived for it. It was the nights you cant remember, the friends youll never forget. High School was my dreams.... I live in a Small town, and everybody knew who i was. I joined the fire dept, and I love it. Seen some awesome stuff, seen some horrible stuff, its life..
Im a big guy, 5'10, 279, benched 410 when i graduated.
Some say Im cocky, I think im confident, I live by the rules that you give what you get, i believe in OAK tree justice, and think that criminals have the easiest way of life in America.

In high school, nothing but drink, up until my senior year, went to school 3 weeks in a row drunk, it was fun, little did i know i was a loser. On September 17, 2004 i got into a car accident. I was in the back seat of a DODGE NEON, driving in the rain on a donut. Car lost control, and donut blew, the driver could have controlled it, if he wasnt stoned. I was thrown out the back window into the gorge, breaking 4 ribs, the my lower spine, and a concussion, shouldnt have lived, but god thought other wise.

The next months would be hell, senior year was gone, i couldnt walk, or go anywhere. I finally went to school after a while. A lot of surgery, and therapy, got me walking again. Shouldnt have gotten in the car, but i was tougher than luck, and everyone knows, it wont happen to you.

School was different, i wasnt tough anymore, and i had to catch up with all the work. February came around. No one was willing to care. THats when i Met her. The most outspoken girl, whose immaturaty and careless ness, was entertaining in herself. She had beauty that was able to compete with the angels, and the smile to light up the midnight sky. She gave me a chance. Thats why i love her.

The next few months were full of late night conversations, loving her more each day, seeing in her eyes that It was in return. After about 9 months, it happened. She said yes, even though we had been an item since the very begining. I found her ways odd. She lives by the bible, abstinent until marriage, the self control she displays is attractive in itself. She is the one, and i feel it everytime i look in her eyes.

I walked across that stage in June, bottom of the class. My father who could care less of me, told me he was proud. This giant of a guy cried in front of hundreds, thankfully, i wasnt alone. I kissed her, and thanked her, because she had been my motivation, my reasoning to succeed, to provide a good lifestyle for her, the one that she deserves. That stage meant nothing in technially terms. I was so behind, that after two years in the real world, im still working on my diploma.

Its funny the way that life works. You dont know what you have until its gone. You could live to be a hundred, or you could die tommorow. I truly believe that god gave me a second chance. I need to take it. I have been sober for two years now. I am working on my diploma, and in the morning I will going to my local college to sign up for courses. I have been working at an auto parts store, where I have finally saved up enough to move out on my own.

I dont know what to say. I feel like a loser, I do nothing but work, and have nothing to show for it. I live in my parents house, with just my dog, and no one who seems to understand. I dont know where to go from here. I need to better myself, and prove to myself, and the world that i am going to make the best out of my second chance. I want to make a good life for the woman that beleved that i was worth her time. I want to be able to thank her in so many ways, but the only thing i can afford is my love. One day i will give her much more, but until than, she just has my heart.

The moral of my story, is that life is there to be lived, but every once in a while you need to stop and think, where am i foing with this? what is going to happen?. i was tommy t in high school, and three years later, i drive a delivery truck for 8 bucks an hour, and dont even have a diploma. Dont make that mistake. LIfe is a beautiful thing but its not going to be there forever, one day it ends.

My father told me once, " You need to make the best of life, when your on your death bed, you will know all of the things you have done, and all the things that you have accomplished. It is when you know all of lifes answers when god takes your soul"

I know I have jumped around with this, and made no sense at alot of points, mostly because right now my emotions are a mess. I appreciate being able to vent here, and you reading this, for those of you who could, it seems like this is the only place to go right now. So i will say good night, and wish you all a good week...


Touching story man. It sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders, just push on it seems like you'll be fine.:)


I'll tell you what, I recently turned 30. I'm young, but not that young.....everyday it seems, I'm trying to figure out life. What's it about, what's our purpose.....where am I going to be in the future...who is going to be there with me. ......It's a scary thing to me.

Sometimes life can be so damn hard, but I guess in the grand scheme of things, we are only here for a very, very short time. So I guess stick it out and try to make the best of it. That's my motto.:ermm:

[gncc025]

yep late teens and early twenties can be confusing times. im only twenty and already confused and worried about my future. ive gotten a college degree made good grades and all but no job opportunities to amount to anything in my field. i know ive got my whole life ahead of me but it still bothers me that i cant find a job that i would LIKE to have NOW. this is what lifes about though, the good times and hard times. ive come to find though if you honestly make an effort at something it will eventually work out. just remember you will always have problems in life big or small just learn to make the best of it. remember your never alone in life. the big man is there with you, BELIEVE IT or not.

[400exrider707]

Originally posted by Bradracer18
Sorry to be the bad guy here....but grades DO matter...and I think these guys know that, but are trying to prove another point.




What field of study were you in? My company I got hired for never asked what my grades were like, and they weren't on my resume. I was always a C average student, nothing special, and I certainly failed my fair share of classes. Most of the employers at the career fairs I went to didn't ask about grades either.

[wilkin250r]

Originally posted by Bradracer18
Sorry to be the bad guy here....but grades DO matter...and I think these guys know that, but are trying to prove another point.

Not high school, they don't.

When you're fresh out of college, or more importantly, still in college and looking for an internship, yes they will look at your GPA. But even then, they're only interested in your college GPA, they couldn't care less about your high school GPA.

Once you have been in the workforce for 5 years, NOBODY cares about your GPA. It's all about experiene and job performance.

[Cr85rRida]

"Actions have reactions, don't be quick to judge
You may not know the harships people don't speak of
It's best to step back, and observe with couth
For we all must meet our moment of truth"

"moment of truth" - Gang Starr

http://youtube.com/watch?v=lH3hrtp1T84

[my88r]

i don't what to say after reading this stuff. high school for me was pretty rough 2 of my friend killed them selves. the first one drove a car into our school. the other just recently happened, i don't think there was a drug that he didn't take and he was always drinking. my senior year i really had fun. im glad to have graduated. now im getting a parts business going. i want to stay in the atv/motorcycle industry.but i know i have changed because of everything that happened in high school.

[Bradracer18]

I wasn't saying high school GPA, I was refering to college GPA.


And, I'm an engineering major....GPA does matter....if you want a good job, right out of the chute.


John Deere, will not look at you, unless you have above a 3.0 Same with Cat.

[07250ex]

Wow its sad to hear about how 2 of your buddies died... Every couple of a years a few kids die at our highschool from car crashes are town has lots of curvy roads with trees and rocks and people love to speed through it and every few years one of the "lucky" ones ends up hitting them

[Toadz400]

Originally posted by 07250ex
Wow its sad to hear about how 2 of your buddies died... Every couple of a years a few kids die at our highschool from car crashes are town has lots of curvy roads with trees and rocks and people love to speed through it and every few years one of the "lucky" ones ends up hitting them

In the past 4-6 years the school that I graduated from had over 11 students die in car accidents. Sh*t happens, a lot.

As for the grades thing. I'm going through school in the Engineering field and what Engineers and companies have told us is that they tend to steer away from the 4.0 students as they tend to have no communication or team skills. Companies look for knowledge/understanding (grades have nothing to do with that), great communication skills (for almost any job), and able to work effectively in teams.

[Bradracer18]

I agree 100% with your above statement about grades. But, along those same lines....that doesn't mean you can have a 2.00 average either(or expect to get starting pay as a 2.8-3.4 gpa)


From what I have heard too....they are looking in that range of about 2.7-3.4...with the qualities to match!


Work hard...those grades don't come easily...or for me anyways. I'm the best one, in the labs...but near the middle/bottom when test time comes. I think exams are the worst way to test your "grasp/understanding" of a subject.

Originally posted by Toadz400
Very moving story, from you and Wilkin.

I've had similar experiences but none that were really near-death.

x2

[Toadz400]

Originally posted by Bradracer18
I agree 100% with your above statement about grades. But, along those same lines....that doesn't mean you can have a 2.00 average either(or expect to get starting pay as a 2.8-3.4 gpa)


From what I have heard too....they are looking in that range of about 2.7-3.4...with the qualities to match!


Work hard...those grades don't come easily...or for me anyways. I'm the best one, in the labs...but near the middle/bottom when test time comes. I think exams are the worst way to test your "grasp/understanding" of a subject.

Engineers have also told us that if they could go through college again they wouldn't worry about what grade they got but try to gain as much knowledge as possible. They spent so much time worrying about getting as high of a grade as possible that they didn't learn as much as they could've.

[criminalpoet]

All I can say is this, if its success that you want both in your love life and your financial status in life then you already have what it takes. All you need is the exact emotions that you have already displayed in your post. Because those particular emotions are like high octane fuel for true sincere desire to come up in life. Its called caring, and if you care you will succeed, if you dont care then you wont.

One thing that I truely want you to realize is the fact that time truely is still on your side man. YOUR STILL YOUNG lol! Take advantage of it. As long as time is on your side, do to your age, anything in life is possible. Hell, when I was a young man I had life as *** backwards as anyone could have ever had it. I was involved in drugs, violence, gangs, you name it ive done and seen it and experienced it.

I ended up dropping out of high school when I was in the 9th grade, I also disowned my adopted family and was now living full time on the streets. I spent the next two years of my life screwing up in the biggest possible way. At 16 years of age I was shot and damned near died. My closest friend was also shot in the same incident and ended up being a vegetable. Shortly after I turned 17 my friend passed away and I was devastated!

But, the very next day when I woke up I had an epiphany. I had desided that my present lifestyle was not what I truely wanted, it just wasnt the life that I wanted for myself. So I went back to school as a 17 year old freshman lol. And you know what man? I did all 24 of my credits in 2 years and ended up graduating with a 4.2. All while holding down a full time evening job and living out of a motel room.

All you need in life to change and succeed is the desire to do so and it will be yours. Time is on your side and the feeling of being a "low life" is exactly what God is going to use to humble you and build up your charater. The Bible says that God will not put you in any situation that He doesnt feel you can handle. So look at your personal shame, termoil, and crappy situation as a compliment from God. If your going through that much chit than God must think pretty highly of you, He must think that your truely capable of acomplishing and overcoming a lot.

Anyways for what its worth thats my 2 cents.

Good luck to you but I highly doubt that you'll need it. Just keep on keeping on man and dont take your eye off of the ball.

[Toadz400]

Originally posted by criminalpoet
The Bible says that God will not put you in any situation that He doesnt feel you can handle. So look at your personal shame, termoil, and crappy situation as a compliment from God. If your going through that much chit than God must think pretty highly of you, He must think that your truely capable of acomplishing and overcoming a lot.

I've been to church my entire life and went through all the confirmation stuff and I have never had it put to me like that. That's an awesome way of looking at things and I am probably going through the worst of my life right now and that just brought me up a little. Thanks.

[troyleepred719]

Originally posted by criminalpoet
All I can say is this, if its success that you want both in your love life and your financial status in life then you already have what it takes. All you need is the exact emotions that you have already displayed in your post. Because those particular emotions are like high octane fuel for true sincere desire to come up in life. Its called caring, and if you care you will succeed, if you dont care then you wont.

One thing that I truely want you to realize is the fact that time truely is still on your side man. YOUR STILL YOUNG lol! Take advantage of it. As long as time is on your side, do to your age, anything in life is possible. Hell, when I was a young man I had life as *** backwards as anyone could have ever had it. I was involved in drugs, violence, gangs, you name it ive done and seen it and experienced it.

I ended up dropping out of high school when I was in the 9th grade, I also disowned my adopted family and was now living full time on the streets. I spent the next two years of my life screwing up in the biggest possible way. At 16 years of age I was shot and damned near died. My closest friend was also shot in the same incident and ended up being a vegetable. Shortly after I turned 17 my friend passed away and I was devastated!

But, the very next day when I woke up I had an epiphany. I had desided that my present lifestyle was not what I truely wanted, it just wasnt the life that I wanted for myself. So I went back to school as a 17 year old freshman lol. And you know what man? I did all 24 of my credits in 2 years and ended up graduating with a 4.2. All while holding down a full time evening job and living out of a motel room.

All you need in life to change and succeed is the desire to do so and it will be yours. Time is on your side and the feeling of being a "low life" is exactly what God is going to use to humble you and build up your charater. The Bible says that God will not put you in any situation that He doesnt feel you can handle. So look at your personal shame, termoil, and crappy situation as a compliment from God. If your going through that much chit than God must think pretty highly of you, He must think that your truely capable of acomplishing and overcoming a lot.

Anyways for what its worth thats my 2 cents.

Good luck to you but I highly doubt that you'll need it. Just keep on keeping on man and dont take your eye off of the ball.



Thats very inspiring. I like your analogy of gods ways, and it makes me feel more motivated to make the most of it. Thanks for all your help.

[trxwannbe]

many times i've heard this song and it makes me remember that even with everything i've done wrong i still have a lot of time to turn it all around

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