Confused

[ballz2thewall]

Well I got a call today and I was offered a job at an Army installation that I worked at before I came to this job ( also an Army installation). The thing is there is no pay raise or anything, but it is just a way better environment to work at. All my family lives there but my wife wants to keep her job here and said that I can go and we will get together on the weekends and stuff. Now the hard part is leaving my son, I know what it's like to grow up without a father and do not want to put him through me not being there for him! This job I have now is just stressful in its self, some of the people are ignorant and I can't stand having to be around them! I know this is my decision to make but what would you do if you had this dilemma?

[antman]

you should go and take your son with you ... then your whife will most likely decide to come too.

[ballz2thewall]

getting her to let me take my son with me would be like taking a twinky from a fat kid, not going to happen!

[antman]

he is your kid too. but i know what you mean. how old is he??? and how far it the new job from the old one?

[ballz2thewall]

he's a year, and it's 3 hours!

[antman]

thats not that far but still what does your wife do, that she doesnt want to leave

[ballz2thewall]

she is Active Duty National Guard, she plays with papers all day!

[derekhonda]

without any more incentives they can't really expect you to take this job. Now if they were throwing out a heafty pay raise or more benefits or something thats a different story. Just stick it out where you are, it keeps things simple.

your wife and child are really your priority. stay whee you are at now. you extended family is not as important as your immediate family, and they are only 3 hours away. the pay is the same so that is not a factor(although taking the new position would be like taking a pay cut-travel time/ expenses on weekends, double the living arangements and living costs, etc)

look at it this way, were you happy in your present job, before you received this offer? if the answer is yes, and your wife does not wan to quit or move, then remain happy here and enjoy your marriage.
how long do you think she is going to want to be a wife on weekends only, or ouy only a weekend husband?

[ballz2thewall]

Well, money really isn't an issue, the real issue is I am unhappy with my current job and that in turn is kinda starting aruments at the home front because of me being in a chitty mood!

[Aceman]

So what's keeping you from getting a different job where you live now? Military requirements?

[miller821]

I wouldn't go unless they went..... Me, I couldn't imagine not growing up with a father... Now if he was older it would be different, but at that age you should just stick with him, cause those days you'll be able to look back on and be glad you did..... Stay there for the kid, and try to work out whatever is going on at your work now.

[harescrambles]

Your not contemplating leaving your wife and child because your job is to stressful are you? your a father.
I like that first sentence from (speedyquad).
Please don't think that I'm bashing you.
Something i learned a long time ago, i leave my work at work i don't even think about it while I'm at home. I'm saying it's just a job.

[ballz2thewall]

I spoke with my wife last night and told her that being a husband and father are a way more important responsibility and obligation than my own needs! Because she said that she thinks I should take the job and anything will work if you try! Like I said before though, my son is little and needs to have both parents in his life. I don't want him to go through what I have gone through (I could write a long book about my life and the events that I had to overcome through). All in all, I cherish my wife and son to much to leave them. Also from what I understand by the beginning of winter I will be leaving them to go over to the big theatre (for those of you who are not familiar with that term it means war/Iraq) it's not in stone yet but they are placing the chizzle to the stone and just waiting to hit it! So I am going to do the right thing and denie my offer! Thank everyone who has posted in this thread I greatly appreciate it!

[miller821]

Originally posted by ballz2thewall
I spoke with my wife last night and told her that being a husband and father are a way more important responsibility and obligation than my own needs! Because she said that she thinks I should take the job and anything will work if you try! Like I said before though, my son is little and needs to have both parents in his life. I don't want him to go through what I have gone through (I could write a long book about my life and the events that I had to overcome through). All in all, I cherish my wife and son to much to leave them. Also from what I understand by the beginning of winter I will be leaving them to go over to the big theatre (for those of you who are not familiar with that term it means war/Iraq) it's not in stone yet but they are placing the chizzle to the stone and just waiting to hit it! So I am going to do the right thing and denie my offer! Thank everyone who has posted in this thread I greatly appreciate it!
Greatest decision you'll ever make..... If you are going to Iraq, its better for you to see them as much as possible until you do go..... Good Choice.