Car related jokes

[DEAL]

Does anyone have any good car related jokes ..
any brand .. I find it all funny..


I got a few ...
Whats the difference between a ford and a golf ball?

You can drive a golf ball over 200 yards.

Did you hear 90% of the fords sold are still on the road today?

thats because only 10% made it home.

haha don't wanna offend you ford guys .. I'm only joking.

[nosliw]

http://img206.exs.cx/img206/2396/dodgesucks3us.jpg

[I-7]

PONTIAC... Poor old.... yeah I think you guys get the rest of it right?

[GW_400ex]

:D :D PONTIAC i love that one :),

FORD F*cked Over Rebuilt Dodge..

[Honda4trax250x]

Ford backward is "Driver returns on foot."





What do dodge trucks and tampons have in common? All pu$$ies have one.:devil:

[fasterblaster09]

[QUOTE]Originally posted by I-7
PONTIAC... Poor old.... yeah I think you guys get the rest of it right? [/QUOTE

haha u beat me to it

[TheX1992]

I'm a diehard Chevy fan but this one gets me every time...


Chevrolet

Can Hear Every Valve Rattle On Long Extended Trips

[roostin_dale]

Originally posted by DEAL
.

Did you hear 90% of the fords sold are still on the road today?

thats because only 10% made it home.


haha, as soon as I saw the title to this...thats the joke I was gunna post...:cool:

[cknox88]

Originally posted by Honda4trax250x
Ford backward is "Driver returns on foot."





What do dodge trucks and tampons have in common? All pu$$ies have one.:devil:


LOL that is a good one i have one just like that but about fords.

What do Fords and Tampons have in common?
BOTH REQUIRE TOW ROPES

[Hillshooter]

JEEP = just empty every pocket

[EPDP99]

Cranks
Hard
Every
Valve
Rattles
Oil
Leaks
Every
Time

[Thump_It]

FORD
First On Race Day
F'en Oregonians Really Digg'em
Fix Or Repair Daily

GMC
Generic Made Chevy
Gotta Mechanic Coming

TOYOTA
Take Off Your Oversized Tires A-hole
Dodge.....well they just suck

Chevy says it all by themselves, Like a Rock (just sits there unless other outside source of energy moves it)

[HiperEX]

I like this one

My lugnuts take more torque than your import makes!:devil:

sticker on my buds cummins- dodge makes it cummins shakes it

[fst400exrider]

quit powerstrokeing and start cummins

[Scott-300ex]

lmao

my friend just said quit stroking and start coming and then i go to page 2 and he's like omg

GM-general mistake


i like all the gm and chevy ones

haha

[Astars_250r]

I don't know if I would call these jokes more like funny comments / statements. The golf ball one was a joke and that's about it.

Originally posted by I-7
PONTIAC... Poor old.... yeah I think you guys get the rest of it right?

PONTIAC
Poor Old N***ers Think Its A Cadallac
(its just a joke)

[LazeR]

Jeep = Just extra expensive parts

[S2P]

MOPAR

Move over people are racing:blah:

[S2P]

A guy drops off his coupe deville at the dealer for an oil change, while he plays around of golf with his buddies. When he gets done he goes back to the dealer to pick up the car. While taking his money out to pay the girl a golf tee falls to the floor. She asks whats that? He says a tee. What do you use that for? He says you set your balls on them while your driving. She says Wow what will caddillac think of next

[underpowered]

Did you know the new Fords come with heated tailgates?

It is so your hands dont get cold while pushing them.

Found Off Road Dead
Found On Road Dead
Fix Or Repair Daily

VW=Virtually worthless

i got a ton of these, but all i know off the top of my head

[Scott-300ex]

the joke is bumpers:rolleyes:

[Cool Honda Man]

Ford
For
Off
Road
Drivers

Jeep
Just
Eats
Every
Pothole

Honda
Hang
On
Not
Done
Acclerating

Chevrolet
Constantly
Having
Every
Vehicle
Recalled
Over
Lousy
Engineering
Techniques

[RideRed250ex]

Originally posted by S2P
MOPAR

Move over people are racing:blah:



The Best! :macho

[underpowered]

Here are a bunch, but i have quite a few more, 8 pages worth to be exact.

VOLVO

Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object

TOYOTA

Too Often Yankees Overprice This Auto
Taking Our Yen Out -- Thanks All
Transportation Of Young Or Tasteless Airheads
Torturous On Your Old Tired ***
The One You Ought To Avoid

SUBARU

Screwed Up Beyond All Repair Usually
U R A BUS (read backwards)

SAAB

Send Another Automobile Back
Slick As A Brick
Swedish Auto - Always Broken
Swedish Automobiles Always Breakdown
Swedish Auto's Are Best
Sad Attempt At Beauty
Sorry Auto, Always Broken
Shape Appears ***-Backward

OLDS

One Leak, Dead Starter
Older, Louder, Dumber, Slower
Obnoxious, Loud Death Sled

NISSAN

Never I Shall Steal Another Nissan

MOPAR

Made Of Plastic And Rubber
Most Often Passed At Races
Most Often Proven At the Racetrack
Most OverPowered And Respected
Massively OverPowered And Respected
Mostly Old Parts And Rust
Mostly Old Paint And Rust
Mounds Of Power And Revs
Move Over, Pentastar Approaching Rapidly
MOst Perfect Automobiles for Racing
Masters Or Performance and Racing
Mitsubishi's Over Priced American Replicars
My Old Pig Ain't Running
My Old Pig Always Roars
My Old Plymouth Ain't Runnin.
More Overall Performance And Reliability
Mostly Obsolete Parts Assembled Randomly
Miscellaneous Oddball Parts Assembled Ridiculously
Most Often Passed At Races
My Only Problems Are Repairs
Move Over People Are Racing

HYUNDAI

Hope You Understand Nothing's Driveable And Inexpensive

FORD

F**ked over rebuilt Dodge
Flip over read directions
Fix Or Repair Daily
Found On Rockville Dump
Fails On Rainy Days
Fastest On Race Day
Fastest On Road Daily
First On Race Day (proven false)
Fourth On Race Day (of the "Big Three", fourth is pretty bad!)
First On Recall Day
First On Road to Dump
First On Rust and Deterioration
Found On Road Dead
Found On Rubbish Dump
Four Old Rusty Doors
Fool Only Runs Downhill (expletive replaced)
Driver Returns On Foot (backwards)
Fault Of R&D
Fast Only Rolling Downhill
Features O.J. and Ron's DNA
F'in's Owner's Really Dumb
Fatally Obese Redneck Driver
Freaky Obsolete Racing Device
Fireball On Rear Denting
Fork Over Repair Dough
Frequent Opinion: Really Disappointed
Fumes and Odors Readily Detectable
Forward Only, Reverse Defective
Forced On Reluctant Drivers

[wilsonracing]

Hang
o
n
dumb
*****

[DEAL]

What do you call a ford with dual exhausts?


A wheel barrow...

[hondaguy2]

Ashes to ashes,
dust to dust,
if it wasnt for Chevys our tools would rust :D
just one i heard from my dad

[KFX21]

You know a Ford has to have atleast one Chevy part on it........................................... because they can't build a complete f*ck up!!!

[300_ryder]

Your HONDA civic has 1.9 leters Well guess what my mountain dew has 2.0

[clutt225]

I'd love to see a classic chevy but all the rocks turned to gravel.

[nosliw]

Originally posted by 300_ryder
Your HONDA civic has 1.9 leters Well guess what my mountain dew has 2.0

yep lol. here's the pic


http://img214.exs.cx/img214/3095/riceranddew3ik.jpg