Joke of the day.

[SGA]

I needed a good laugh, maybe one of these will make you laugh too. :)

A guy with a black eye boards his plane bound for Pittsburgh and sits down in his seat.

He notices immediately that the guy next to him has a black eye, too. He says to him, "Hey, this is a coincidence, we both have black eyes; mind if I ask how you got yours?"

The other guy says, "Well, it just happened, it was a tongue twister accident. See, I was at the ticket counter and this gorgeous blonde with the most massive breasts in the world was there. So, instead of saying, 'I'd like two tickets to Pittsburgh,' I accidentally said, 'I'd like two pickets to Tittsburgh'....so she socked me a good one."

The first guy replied, "Wow! This is unbelievable. Mine was a tongue twister too. I was at the breakfast table and I wanted to say to my wife, 'Please pour me a bowl of Frosties, honey.' But I accidentally said, 'You have ruined my life you evil, self-centered, fat-assed bi*ch.'

[SGA]

Top 15 Favorite Country Songs:

If I Can't Be Number One In Your Life, Then Number Two On You


If The Phone Don't Ring, You'll Know It's Me


How Can I Miss You If You Won't Go Away?


I Liked You Better Before I Got to Know You So Well


I Still Miss You Baby, But My Aim's Gettin' Better


I Wouldn't Take Her To A Dog Fight 'Cause I'm Afraid She'd Win


I'll Marry You Tomorrow But Let's Honeymoon Tonight


I'm So Miserable Without You It's Like You're still Here


If I Had Shot You When I Wanted To I'd Be Out Of Prison By Now


My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend And I Sure Do Miss Him


She Got The Ring And I Got The Finger


You're The Reason Our Kids Are So Ugly


Her Teeth Was Stained But Her Heart Was Pure


She's Looking Better After Every Beer


I ain't ever Gone To Bed With An Ugly Woman, but I've Sure Woken Up With A Few

[Quad18star]

HAHAHA good ones . I like the first one the most . :p

[TheFontMaster]

Good jokes, good jokes:)

[SGA]

I cant resist, one more;)

There was this couple who had been married for 50 years.

They were sitting at the breakfast table one morning when the old gentleman said to his wife, "Just think, honey, we've been married for 50 years."

"Yeah," she replied, "Just think, fifty years ago we were sitting here at this breakfast table together."

"I know," the old man said, "We were probably sitting here naked as jaybirds fifty years
ago."

"Well," Granny snickered, "What do you say...should we get naked?"

Where upon the two stripped to the buff and sat down at the table.

"You know, honey," the little old lady breathlessly replied,"My breasts are as hot for you today as they were fifty years ago."

"I wouldn't be surprised," replied Gramps. "One's in your coffee and the other is in your oatmeal!:scary:

[JOEX]

I Liked You Better Before I Got to Know You So Well

I can relate to that one and a few others:p :ermm:

[440exnacsracer]

i def. like the third one....:p :D coffee....oatmeal,,,haha